Air {Elements of Power 3}

Chapter 18: Roxy

I sat at the window after that, gazing out across the city while trying-and failing-not to think about what the purple freak had said.

My father couldn't have... wouldn't have...

With a Brizan. The Brizan Queen.

I hadn't even been born at the time. My father hadn't had the chance to meet me, or hold me in his arms. His first born. His only child. He wouldn't have given that up. Not for anyone. Especially not for a Brizan. Or for her. He wouldn't have given me up to play happy families with the Brizan Queen and the freak.

Flames flared furiously in my palms. No. My father did care about me. My mother, he definitely hated, so I couldn't really blame him for having an affair, but another child? How could he not have told me? Sure, we had secrets, but nothing that huge. My chest tightened under the immense weight of the freak's revelation.

Oh flames, what was going on? This was just too much to deal with.

The fires still raged in the city. But all I could see of them was a faint glow through the thick smog. What the flames had Cin done? Clearly, he wasn't all that interested in getting me back. He just wanted an excuse to destroy stuff and kill me off. With me dead, Avery would be next in line for the throne. He could marry her and take control that way. Exacting painful revenge on me at the same time.

There was another knock at the door. This time, whoever it was waited for an answer, rather than walking in as the purple freak had.

"Come in." Maybe it would be Tris. He hadn't stopped by in a while.

I was wrong. It seemed to be becoming a common occurrence recently.

Brae stood in the room, looking uneasy.

"Planning to say anything to me this time?"

"Sorry about that." He nearly smiled. Not quite, but it was close. "Everything was going wrong, I thought that I should come and see you, to check that you were okay, but when I got here, I just didn't know what to say."

"There was a lot going on."

He exhaled, as though relieved.

"So why have you come now then?"

He gestured to the window.

"What are you going to do?" The question escaped my lips against my better judgement; I didn't really want to know the answer, not when it could mean my death, but, at the same time, I had to find out what he was planning to do. This might be the last time I would ever see him.

"Well, I'm definitely not going to give him what he wants-you." My eyes widened, in shock. Did Brae really mean that? "I would look weak if I handed you over to him now; it would seem as though I had been scared off by his attack." Ah okay, there was a political motive behind keeping me safe. "And he's already broken his word once, who's to say he wouldn't attack us anyway once he had you?" Brae shook his head. "I would much rather keep a Helian on our side."

I laughed at that, "and what makes you think I'll be willing to co-operate?"

"Well you were the one that came to me." He smiled, properly this time, the left corner of his lips tugged upwards as though he couldn't help himself.

"That was weeks ago. I think I've changed my mind about you now." Liar. "I don't think I want to help." I lay back against the pillows as nonchalantly as possible.

"Look, Roxy, I'm sorry, I didn't know-"

"I already know."

He looked confused.

"She told me. Purple Freak. Your girlfriend."

"She's not really my... Not any more," he sighed. "It's complicated."

I suppressed a laugh. Oh Brae. What was I going to do with my Arcan Prince? Jasmine made one mistake and he tossed her to the side, deeming her imperfect. And then he came to me. How could that possibly make any sense to him? It was concerning that he could be that much of an Air-Head. I was infinitely darker and more broken than she was. Even for him I could never be perfect; it just wasn't who I was. If I told him that, I would risk losing him. But if I kept quiet, I risked losing myself instead.

A flame flared subconsciously in my right palm; a glaring reminder of just how important being myself was. I had lost what made me, me, once before; I wasn't going to risk myself again-not even for Brae.

"So you found out that she wasn't perfect. Big deal. I would have thought the purple would have been a clue to that. You need to get over yourself, Arcan. I would have done exactly the same in her situation, so there's no point looking at me as if I'm the answer to all of your problems. Helians lie. We cheat. We deceive. Like it or not, your girlfriend is a Helian. I'm not going to promise to always tell you the truth either, especially not if I thought I could lose you in the process. In fact, I can almost guarantee that this is the one and only time I will be brutally honest with you, despite the risk it poses to whatever... connection we might have."

"At least you're honest about your dishonesty. I never thought that Jasmine could..."

"Make a mistake? Trust me, I have waaaaay more reason than you to be burned with her, but even I realise that if we're going to overcome what Cin's throwing at us, there isn't going to be time for petty arguments. Don't get me wrong, she's not my new best friend; what she did was horrible, but you know what? It didn't kill me and in the long run, it has probably only helped me grow stronger. I didn't need an Arcan Prince to come to my rescue. I saved myself. And Jasmine? By keeping you away, she probably did save your life too. And besides, right now, we are the only firepower you've got, so we're going to have to work as a team."

Brae looked at me, smiling. "When did you get so smart?"

"Please, I've always been this smart. It's just taken you this long to realise, Air-He... Sorry, I should probably work on that."

Brae shrugged. "Well if you're going to be staying here for a while, you should probably try not to use it so much-it won't go down very well. Although I guess you must be getting much better at your other Realm etiquette, given the amount of time you spent in the Sephan Realm."

I scrunched my face up. "Hardly. No one but Tris would speak to me, and he wanted me to go around looking menacing and Helian anyway. It wasn't like I had to integrate."

"Being without your powers must have been tough." That was one of the things I liked most about Brae-despite his egocentric flaws, he got me.

"Impossible." Sparks flared at my fingertips instinctively, calming down the panic that gripped my chest at the very thought of being without them. I had to remind myself to calm down and breathe. I had them back now.

I was still me.

{I love this chapter and I really hope you do too! Please vote/comment to let me know! Do you agree with Roxy? Dedicated to skiesfullofstars for the lightning-fast comment!}