Ace Of Spades (Complete Raw First Draft, Unedited)

Twenty- Five: Shattered

Jenna was quiet the rest of that morning. I put it down to the late night we had, and too many drinks, but, deep down, I knew she'd had a huge scare.

At first, I'd felt kind of shattered that she thought I'd betray her that way. I had to reminded myself about everything she'd been through the last fifteen years of her life, used up and passed around like an object, without having any say about her life or her body. It made me sick just to think about, so I could hardly blame her for the lack of trust. I was just going to have to be patient with her.

Since neither of us were feeling flash hot, we both crashed on the couch and put a movie on. Jenna surprised me by cuddling up to me and resting her head on my shoulder. I smiled and put my arm around her, pulling her a little closer.

Eventually, we ended up lying down together, my chest against her back, holding onto her tightly so that we both fit on the couch comfortably. She seemed unsure at first, but she relaxed after a while when I entwined my fingers with hers, resting our hands on her hip.

After the movie ended, I thought she must have fallen asleep, since she didn't move at first, and I was fighting to stay awake myself, but then, she turned her head, shifting onto her back so she could look up at me.

"I'm sorry for flipping out earlier," she said quietly. "I've seen packages like that one before. Lucas used to send them out, and, I thought..."

She trailed off, swallowing hard, meeting my eyes again.

"It's just so hard for me to trust people."

"I get it," I told her, brushing my thumb against her cheekbone. "I totally understand, so don't worry about it, okay?"

She closed her eyes, putting her hand over mine where it rested against the side of her face.

"I didn't thank you, either," she said, sitting up with me. "For making that deal. I know you're taking a huge risk to help me, and I'm so grateful."

I felt that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach again, when I thought about the kilo of cocaine taped to the underside of my drawer. But, then, when I looked down into her shining eyes, the sadness I always saw there had gone and was replaced by gratitude. I knew I'd made the right decision. She needed this from me.

"I want to help you," I reminded her. "It's fucking horrible, what's happened to you, and those other girls. It can't keep happening. Lucas can't get away with it."

"Thank you for helping us," she told me. "I won't forget it."

She reached up, brushing the lightest of kisses over my mouth, her lips feather soft against mine. It took me a moment to react, but, when I returned it, she deepened the kiss, circling her arms around my neck, until I pulled away from her, studying her, worried that she felt she had to return the favour, like she did when I first brought her home.

Jenna still had her eyes closed, her lips slightly parted, but she was frowning, her jaw tightly clenched. I gently tilted her chin up, and she opened her eyes finally.

She looked away, her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry," she muttered. "I shouldn't have done that."

"Don't be sorry," I said, grinning like an idiot as I pulled her hair back behind her ear.

The smile gave way to a frown as I saw that the sadness had returned to her eyes, her posture timid and unsure once again.

"What's wrong?" I asked her, worried.

"I know you said you expected nothing from me," she started, after a moment's hesitation. "But, you kissed me back. And, then you stopped, without making me do anything else for you. I'm confused."