Mono No Aware

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   Life often circles back and the things we thought were important, fade with time

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   Life often circles back and the things we thought were important, fade with time. They become like leaves on a tree; falling, papering the ground in pretty colored memories from the past. Just as things we were unaware of or gave little meaning to, reveal a deeper purpose and we suddenly find ourselves standing right back in the exact same spot where we had stood before. Only now with a greater understanding as time has changed us, like the leaves on the tree.  Continuously falling as new growth begins, only to be  something pretty and momentary in the sight of passers-by as they walk through their own tree lined path.
  
'I'll be right there....okay....hold on... wait... I'll be right there... I love you... I love you...'

    These words seemed to call out across time and space, beginning as a quiet whisper until all at once it was a shout, and neither of us knew who had begun, but things were changing. I left. I had gone out into the world and now, as I followed the path down the long, dark corridors in their state of damp and permanent decay; I felt as if I was walking back into the warmth and the light of my youth. There in the cramped and dirty spaces and the cathedrals of stone beneath the giant city of the world that was New York, I had been the happiest.
 
    I had traveled the world; I had seen jungles, mountain tops, war-torn cities, exotic communities, but nothing compared to what was right under the rest of the world's feet. This is where I had always felt the most at home, even if I had started out as an outsider. I have never been truly afraid of this place, if only ever uncertain; but isn't that how life should be? We face our uncertainties and we grow. Sometimes we become what we were meant to be. Sometimes we regress, but growing backwards is still growing.
   
    Here I was, facing them again, uncertainties. Looking for a familiar friend, listening out for a familiar voice calling to me in the dark; but now it had been over 2 hours of wandering around. Every secret entrance, every hidden passageway had led to blocked up walls of rubble and debris. New, freshly smoothed bricks and mortar; concealing where only a few knew there had once been a doorway. For the first time since I was a kid, I was really getting turned around down here. I didn't know my way around, anymore and I knew it had to be the dead of night. If I slipped and fell, if I cut myself and I couldn't find my way out; maybe no one knew I was here. Maybe, not even the guys, because honestly what if they weren't here anymore. It seemed absolutely inconceivable! Where would they have gone? Why wouldn't they have said anything?I started talking out loud.

    "Come on guys! I know you're here! Come on, where are you?... Hey! I know you hear me!"

    It wasn't possible that NO ONE knew I was here. Surely they knew, the moment I stepped through the manhole, down into the stairwell. Certainly I set off some alarm, but as time passed, and I was hot and smelly and tired, I became more and more agitated.
    
    Almost frantic, now shouting; "Guys! Donnie! Where the hell are you! I know you hear me! C'mon! You probably SEE me; why aren't you answering?"

    The crumbling ledge I was following alongside a canal, ended abruptly, and I clumsily slipped into water waist high. I struggled to quickly lift my back pack over my head, wrenching my shoulder bag upwards with my teeth, to keep it dry. Finding my legs again, I trudged on a few steps. There was another ledge on the other side I could make my way to.

    The water wasn't so bad, it was cold & moving steadily; fresh water. There was no smell so I felt certain it was a creek. There were so many down here people didn't even know about.  Ponds & wells even. The city had been built over itself a dozen times, leaving these old world, natural "lands" hidden underground as they returned to their original states; taking over the foundation of the island. There was the occasional forgotten shopping cart or mis placed appliance, once or twice the skeletal remains of a small animal, but all in all it usually​ wasn't as gross as you'd think. What a place to grow up!

    I was reminiscing, not paying attention, when the floor beneath my feet fell away and I went under. I was panic stricken, submerged into murky darkness. The current was noticeably stronger now and for a moment i watched my flashlight being swept at least ten feet down below me. Lurching to the surface, choking, gasping for air I gagged aloud; "Nope! That tastes like sewer water!"

    As I finally made my way to the other side of the canal, heaving my belongings desperately behind me, I felt completely idiotic for coming down here like this. Defeated I sat with my knees to my chest, nearly sobbing as I wrung my shirt out and clipped my wet hair up on top of my head.

    "Where are you, God damn it? I don't even know where the hell I am! Please come get me..."

    I was freezing now, shaking, and I began pulling my clothes from my bags; looking for anything dry.  I peeled off my wet jeans and hung them over a pipe running along the wall to my back. The pipes! They would lead to civilization!  I looked out across the water; I couldn't go back the way I came. The ledge where I now stood continued off into the darkness. If I went slow, I could use the light from my phone to make my way.

    I dug out a dry pair of pants and a flannel from my bag and pulled them on; now searching for my phone. It was wet! It wouldn't power on! Now I was not ok. I yelled as loud as I could;
"Hello! Anyone! It's me, April!"

     I remembered my T-phone and pulled it from my back pocket. Flipping it open as fast as I could, my heart raced. It was still working and it had GPS! Now I was determined to just find a way out, I will come back again tomorrow I grumbled to myself,  I just needed to know where I was under the city block so I could find an exit point and reemerge, topside.

For a moment, as the GPS  was loading; if only for a split second, something a lesser aware person would not have noticed at all, I saw a shadow of movement across the surface of the screen. There was something large behind me, overhead, and I was filled with fear. Holding it in, letting only an involuntary  gasp escape, trying not to let on how truly scared I was; I turned to face whatever haunted me in these now horrible shadows. To my shock, what I was searching for was already there and as I looked up, I saw the length of his body drop down from the pipes overhead. Donnie!

The Ahh-ness of Things (or The Sentinel of Mono No Aware)Nơi câu chuyện tồn tại. Hãy khám phá bây giờ