I Choose You.

Chapter 4

Castiel's POV

"Beat you, AGAIN!!" I said as I watched Dean's face drop and then an angry expression spreading across his face. "Dammit, Castiel." He said, "How the hell did you get so good at that?" I like how he says my name. Is that weird? I shrugged, "practice.. Now, admit I'm better than you." He turned his face to mine, "Never." He said matter-of-factly. "Hm.. Fine.. Maybe I'll just go and eat your pie then?" He looked at me with a bitch-you-better-not glare in his eyes. I got up and walked to the door slowly, he wouldn't budge. I put my hand on the door knob and said, "I bet your pie is real good, dean.." He looked at me and gave in, "fine!! You're better than me! There!" I smiled and sat back down. "That wasn't so hard, now was it?" He just crossed his arms.

"You wanna grab some grub?" He asked when he decided to stop being so stubborn. I nodded and then we headed downstairs to raid his kitchen. Dean got in the fridge and grabbed two sodas, then threw me one. There were cookies on the table so I grabbed one and ate it. Dean did the same. With a mouth full of cookie, I muttered out "we should really get some of our project done, Dean". He sighed and rolled his eyes, "yeah, I know.. Let's eat something then work on it. Then we can hang out for a while and go to sleep." I agreed and took a gulp of my soda.

After we ate, we sat at the dinning room table and worked on our project. Surprisingly, Dean actually knew what he was doing. Not too long after that, we got a big part of the project done and went back upstairs to Dean's room.

Dean blew up the air mattress that I was going to sleep on and we both sat down on it. We talked for a while, a good two hours atleast. We avoided the topic of my scars so far. I was glad about that.

"So, Cas, what's up with you? Are you alright? Just with you cutting.. I know we kinda talked about it already.. But still.."

I knew it was coming. Too good to be true for it not to.

I sighed and looked at Dean's bottle-green beautiful eyes. Stop thinking like that, Castiel. "Well.. Um.." I fumbled with my words for a second, trying to get the right ones. "I don't know, Dean.. I have a good home life.. Just at school, I'm the one who gets tortured. A literal living Hell. And these", I pulled my sleeves up, "Make me forget about the torture at school for a little while. It demands my attention when they're there. It's better than having everything playing through my mind over and over, making it worse for me." Dean nodded. "I'd much rather focus on my bleeding wrists than all of them."

"Cas.. I'm sorry.. I don't really know what to do. Do I like, hug you or something?" Dean seemed serious, but I couldn't help but let out a little chuckle. Dean leaned over and patted and rubbed my back awkwardly. I leaned into the touch. "Sometimes I just want it all over with."

With that, Dean scooted over and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Please don't say that.." I leaned my head on his shoulder slightly. "I just don't want to go through that anymore. We're juniors, Dean.. I've been going through this since middle school.. I'm tired. I want to rest. Permanently." He rubbed his hand over my arm and said, "You have a reason to be here though. How about we try to find out what that reason is, hm? I'll help you." I raised my head and looked at him. I wanted to stay in his arms forever just then. I'm crazy. I nodded, "Yeah.. I'd like that. Thanks, Dean. You're a good friend." He smiled at me, "let's get some sleep first though." He got up and turned the lights off. The only light coming in was the moonlight through the window. He walked over and laid down in his bed. "G'night Cas." I got under the covers on the air mattress and said,"Goodnight, Dean."

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"Dean, stop it!" I laughed out, holding my arms up to my face to block the water being sprayed at me. Dean aimed the water hose at me again and sprayed me till I was soaked, "Sorry baby! I can't do that!" He laughed and threw the hose down, running the opposite direction of me. I chased Dean, my feet squishing in the wet grass. Once I got up to him I tackled him to the ground. My wet body pressed against his. It seemed to be a beautiful summer day. "Gotcha!" I said. Dean laughed, "Yeah, you did." He looked at me and leaned up. Before I knew what was happening, I felt his lips on mine. He laid his head back down.

"I love you, Cas." I laid my drenched head on his chest and smiled. I seemed genuinely happy. "I love you too, Dean."

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"Hey, Cas, wake up.. My mom made pancakes.." I groaned in my sleep and groggily opened my eyes.

It was a dream.

Why did it have to be a dream? More importantly, why did I want that to be real? I don't like Dean. Not like that, atleast. I mean, just because he's the first person to be nice to me doesn't mean I want to date him.

"Huh?" I said in confusion, my voice raspy. "Wake up sleeping beauty, theres food on the table." Dean said and backed up. "Oh, alright.." I got up and stretched my arms. Dean started downstairs and I followed him. "Good morning, boys." Mrs.Winchester said. "Good morning, Mrs.Winchester." I said. "Oh please, call me Mary." She smiled at me and sat two plates down on the table.

Dean and I ate the pancakes and went back up to his room. Dean grabbed a folder from his backpack and looked at me. "So, we're gonna try to find out why you're here.. Give you purpose. Maybe it's to help me in algebra?" He laughed and held up his folder. He sat it to the side. "But really, let's try to find out why.. Might take a while though." I nodded, "that's fine with me.." Dean thought about it, "We'll just have to try a bunch of things out. Maybe it's to fix cars? We can go down to Bobby's. See how it goes?" I nodded again, "yeah, sure." Although I'm positive it's not that.

Once we got ready, Dean drove us down to Bobby's. Dean walked us to the back to a car that they practice on. "Have at it." He popped the hood and sat in the drivers seat. He turned on Metallica.

I had no idea what I was doing. I was moving things and undoing caps and got oil everywhere. I mean everywhere. After about an hour I stepped back to Dean. He laughed when he saw me. "You have oil and grease everywhere!" I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, I don't think cars are my thing." Dean laughed again, "me either." I smiled and wiped my hand on his face, leaving a black streak there. Dean dropped his mouth open, "did you just..?" I nodded and laughed, "I did." He got up and wiped his hand on some part of the engine. He walked back to me and smeared the black substance on a clean part of my face.

After a little while we walked out back through the shop and Bobby saw us. "What in the hell happened to you two?!" Dean bit his lip, "we got carried away.. Sorry Bobby.." Bobby rolled his eyes and walked into his office. I'm pretty sure he muttered "Damn idgits." at us. We laughed and got in the impala, covered in oil and grease. "Well that was fun." I said. "But I'm pretty sure cars are my thing."