The Lycaetos

Chapter 12: Determination

I pushed my back further into my bed as I tinkering with my phone, staring at the number I'd dialed from memory then looking up at my ceiling. A cold chill blew in tickling at my skin. It was late in the night and like usual I was up. 

Eyes glued on anything I looked at. Chest aching  from a turmoil of emotions. My palms sweaty. Kind of, sort of, a mess. Well I was anyways. I've just been too lost in my mind lately. Since this morning, this terrible awful morning.

After that my whole day went to shit and here I was. Laying in my bed just fixating on it and my decision.  My plans.

I'd been thinking about it for a while. What I can do to find out what I am. There wasn't much of a lead I could go on and my skill set wasn't exactly worth anything except in getting into trouble. Though maybe getting into some trouble was what I needed. The coincidental leap that could push me forward on this journey of self discovery. So I can be better. Like the swinging of a pendulum. From one side to get to the other. 

Plus, if there are more like me beyond just that one creature, I doubt they'd be hiding anywhere pleasant. 


The phone barely rang for a moment before being picked up. A slow dull silence giving away my cue to speak.

"Hey Kirsa."  I barely manage to whisper. 

She whispers back, annoyed, "It's 3AM..."

I roll my eyes, losing sight of the ceiling I'd been so transfixed on.

Dryly I answered, "You picked up."

Of course she would. Though Kirsa still made a loud sigh at my words. 

"Let's not make my insomnia sentimental." She states. 

I keep my grip tight on the phone. Pausing as I take in her words. Thinking about them but at the same time thinking about something more. The reason I called, but also the reason I was so anxious before this and even now on the phone. I knew she couldn't tell. I hid it well. Though when my pausing was not interrupted by anything from her, something told me that either she was feeling the same as I right now or maybe I wasn't hiding my feelings as well as I thought.

Another second of silence passed us by and still Kirsa was quiet as I. I turned my gaze toward my open window. My bag near it on the floor. Just a flat pack that could maybe hold a few things at most. Though that was all I needed for tonight. 

Tenseness tickled at my fingers and I was further lost in my thoughts of all of this. My surroundings becoming less and less important. Only knowing Kirsa was on the other line being of any significance right now. 

Still she was patiently waiting on the other side. Finally I blurted out the vague question. 

"Hey you want to do something stupid?"

Not a second passed by before Kirsa gave me her answer. 

"Always."