How To Write An Alex Rider Fanfiction

Writing Alex Rider

I know I already covered a few things about this in the first few chapters, but I feel the need to clarify. Honestly, I am freaking sick of all the mistakes people make! I'm sorry, I may sound harsh and while I'm usually so kind and polite and caring etc. etc. etc., when it comes to writing, I will become a mini biatch. 

One thing is making Alex this really appealing hot, young god. A tortured hot young god. Okay, I admit that Alex Rider is probably the cutest thing to ever walk the Earth and if I ever met him, I would probably fall at his feet and worship him and the very ground he walks on. But that doesn't mean I'm writing him into my story like that! That's just an invitation for flamers to bully me and call me mean names. Also, Alex is not perfect. Please, people, he has his flaws. He has his bad hair days like all other teenagers, bad skin days, bad days in general! So please, at least once or twice, right in with, I don't know, maybe a really bad hair day or a really bad day at school. Like, not only does he manage to knock over three desks and the class hamster's cage but he is also failing English and if he doesn't get his act together, he will be removed from accelerated math. 

Another thing is making Alex decide not to quit his MI6 and join the army. I have nothing against people in the army, but there has to be a good reason for it. Did Alex realize he can no longer live life as a normal civilian? That he can't work anymore anywhere due to security risks? So he decides to take his talents for full time and stay at MI6 or maybe even join the SAS? There has to be a good reason. I have read way too many fanfictions where Alex is in the army for no apparent reason. Keep in mind that to be in the army or SAS there are many physical as well as mental and emotional requirements and commitments. We all remember too well that Alex hated being in the SAS, so do you really think he would be willing to repeat his experiences? Unless he's toughened up some, and he decides that he can stomach the hard life after all. My character, Jamuti, from one of my fanfictions, decides to remain with MI6 because she realizes she can no longer adapt to civilian life. She's been through too much to be able to work at a normal workplace, so she stays. Likewise, Alex. Also, keep in mind that Alex had other ambitions besides working for MI6. He wanted to be a footballer, and once even jokingly said, a train driver. His dreams are involved in this people. A possible fanfiction trope would be him playing football for some time, then working for MI6 after that. 

A third problem is making Alex take down twenty bad guys with his bare hands. Okay, I know he's a black belt in karate. But look at Jamuti! She's the daughter of Yassen Gregorovich (remember, copyrighted) and I will not even tell you how many times, despite being trained in four martial arts, she has broken her bones. Let's see, twice when Yassen snapped her dang forearm in RTI, bruised ribs from the time Andrayus and her got into that scuffle...oh yeah, a couple of dozen times. She has a freaking metal plate in her arm from when one of her bones was shattered beyond repair! She's lost over twenty fights in her life, and this was after training with SCORPIA for half her life and achieving mastery in at least 4 martial arts. So Alex...do you really think he could do that? Or if he did, he wouldn't be severely injured? Jamuti once took down three men, all guards at a professional facility. You know what happens to her after that? Turns out, she popped her kneecap when one of the men tried to pull her leg back. She couldn't continue. She ended up getting caught, tortured for information and...yeah, I won't get into the gory details. So if Alex were to, in the very unlikely event, take down about twenty grown men guards with his bare hands, would he or would he not break a couple of bones doing so? Yeah, he sure as hell would. 

Also, please don't write Alex as some sort of affectionate human being. It is in my experience people in the spying business aren't that affectionate. At least, not in public. I have read fanfictions where Alex is kissing people, making love to them as if it has no effect on him or his job. Alex has experienced trauma. He will probably be uncomfortable with close contact and in his later years, he is good looking and he does go to some seedy places...so, yeah. Alex will be a bit awkward. He probably won't kiss anyone in public. He's a spy, so I'm assuming no drugs or alcohol, or very limited. Not enough to get completely drunk. And please don't write Alex Rider's children as prodigies. Just because the parent is a genius doesn't mean the kid will be. Its all based on upbringing and interests. So, for example, if Alex Rider married another fellow spy or someone in a similar profession, then their children may take the same road as their parents. But it isn't guaranteed. Perhaps Alex doesn't want his kids to follow the same path as him and therefore keeps them away from all things espionage-related. Or perhaps he teaches them survival skills and different languages due to their now high status as Alex Rider's successors. 

And Alex Rider is not going to hate on Blunt. I don't know about you, but Alex seems like a chill guy. Whatever happens, happen. As long as the same ish doesn't happen again, he's cool. So people writing Alex revenge Blunt fanfics, beware! Out of character for Alex do something like that, and unless you write it really well, with a legitimate reason and all, I highly doubt people are going to give a grain of salt. 

And the subject of ships...last time I checked, Alex was not gay. However, I am totally cool with people writing gay or lesbian fanfictions! I have nothing against them, except consider that Alex and Yassen have a difficult relationship...I mean, Ian Rider, Alex's uncle, was shot dead by Yassen, and Yassen's mentor was Alex's dad, John Rider. So do you really think Alex will willingly get down on his knees and er, yeah, that? Without good reason, don't write. 

Injuries. I admit that the bullet wound was pretty severe. I have stitches in my knee, but no, I do not flip when people squeeze there. I mean, I stiffen up a bit, and I might just freeze and be tense, but I'm not going to turn into a raging sociopath. Likewise Alex. The bullet wound does not affect his ability any more than normal. He might not be willing to show it to the world but I highly doubt he would become really upset if someone touched him there. And while we're at the subject of injuries, do your research when writing them! I had a stitch in my rib once and it felt like I couldn't breathe. Like, literally, my ribs felt like they were slowly expanding and cracking. So if someone has a broken rib, they are going to have trouble breathing, much less walking and taking down bad guys. I highly doubt even a trained professional like Yassen Gregorovich, Ian Rider or John Rider could manage it. 

PTSD. Okay, like I said before, to write PTSD you have to know the symptoms, causes...all that. And please don't write Alex with so severe PTSD he's basically a broken shell. Have a good reason. Did he go on a mission that literally ripped his world apart? And keep in mind the therapy he would have to get later. MI6 can't have him distracted on missions, so they're bound to get him a good therapist. 

I think I pretty much covered it all. Remember, vote if you like, comment and share. 

Until next time!

-Amber