IF YOU'RE LUCKY (COMPLETE)

7. Lucky

VICTORIA POV

"So this is what it feels like", I sigh, my hands pressed against the glass.

Benji gives me a quizzical look. "What do you mean?"

My hands still on the glass, I rest my forehead on it. "The view is beautiful, no doubt about it. But looking at all these people, this is the first time I've ever looked down at them. Usually, I'm the one looking up at one of these buildings, thinking about what kind of God made them so lucky, so deserving. I used to imagine how powerful and amazing I'd feel if I ever lived in a place like this. But being up here now, I don't feel any different".

He walks up to the window next to me. He stuffs his hands in his pockets as he stares out into the night. "That's because it's the same up here, V.  Money only changes what you surround yourself with, it doesn't find happiness. A lot of people with money try to find it by spending it, only to become broke and depressed. I hear older wealthy people say it's "better to be rich and unhappy than broke and happy".

There's a small pause between us. "Do you believe that?", it comes out almost as a whisper.

His concentration from the glass doesn't move as he talks. "I grew up having everything handed to me. Toys, good grades, jobs... friendships. But no matter how many things I had, it didn't make me any less lonely when my parents left for business trips. It didn't leave me less heartbroken when I found out my friends only hung out with me because I had money. I grew up thinking that it was just life, you know..."

He trails off and looks to me. "I know you had it harder than me growing up, V. Im not going try and tell you that my problems are worse than yours and I know I probably sound like a spoiled brat... but sometimes I do wish I'd lived a normal life. Maybe I'd have real friends by now or a dad that would've played catch with me... maybe I would've been more grateful for that. But I can tell you with with all my soul that there's nothing lucky about having money".

I could hear the desperation and sadness in his voice. His words changed something in me that night. I'd come into his apartment hating the world, a chip on my shoulder because I wasn't born lucky enough. I thought money and status was something that could solve everyone's problems. But here was a man that had everything and nothing.

I wanted so desperately to hold him, to kiss him. I wanted so badly to make him a forget about his sadness, but something was holding me back. My mind kept digging up our conversation from the car earlier. I kept reminding myself that he was still my boss and I was his employee. That he was high society with a fortune 500 company and I was Vicky from the trailer park with nothing but bad memories and credit card debt. As much as we felt the same on the inside, nobody would ever see that. They'd just see a rich guy with a charity case clinging to his bank account. I resist the urge to touch him and close my eyes. I pray silently in hopes that he doesn't make a move because I didn't know how long I could keep it together.

***

BENJI POV

I steal a glance at Victoria, waiting for a reaction. She looked tense, like she was battling with something or herself. My heart ached for her. Her body was beautiful, but it looked like it never rested. The intensity in her eyes made it seem like her brain never stopped thinking, wondering. Her face looked so pretty. The city lights illuminated it, causing her eyes to glisten.

Her face turns to me and gives me a small smile. Her smile said she was okay, her eyes told me different. In that moment, I couldn't hold back. I wanted nothing more than make her forget all her worries, even if for just a night. I look deep into her eyes, searching to see if there was any kind of doubt. She had to feel the same way, she wasn't pulling back. I pushed her hair back as I grabbed her face and gently placed my lips on hers.