IF YOU'RE LUCKY (COMPLETE)

15. Bandaid

BENJI POV

"Victoria, wait!", I shout after her. I push past the crowd and through the ballroom, trying to catch up with her.

God damn it. Did she hear the whole thing?

While I was chasing after her, that damned conversation kept replaying its worst parts in my head. I was livid, beyond pissed off and unfathomed at the fact that my father was even capable of saying those things. And to her, out of all people.

Victoria was tough, she was tough as nails. But even with the right force, nails can come loose.

I wished I could take it all back, rewind back in time. But all I could do now was run like hell and catch up to her.

"Victoria! Please!", I shout. I'm running out of breath and we've somehow managed to end up way past the parking lot and by the garden.

"V", I breathe out as she finally stops. "I—"

"No!", she cries out, spinning around to face me. Her cheeks were flush and wet from tears, her mascara beginning to smudge. "Don't!" Her voice trembles and I could feel the hurt in it.

"Victoria, I'm sorry", is all I could say as I run my hands through my hair.

She frantically looks around as if she's fighting with the words in her head. "I can't do this, Benji", she sobs. "I can't do this!" She motions her arms out around her. "You always talk about people playing parts. Well, I'm tired of playing mine!"

"Victoria", I sigh. "W-what are you talking about? Don't let my father—", I try to reach out to her only for her to pull away.

"This isn't just about your father!", she cries out. "It's everyone! Do you know what my part is? I play the part of a low life. I'm trailer trash who thinks she can fit in with her rich boyfriend! That's my part! I'm tired, Benji! I'm tired of playing this part and acting like I'm convincing anybody because I'm not! I can't convince you or them or your father!" She's hysterical now, unable to control her sobs.

"Benji", she cries. "I've worked my entire life, I'm tired. I'm tired of constantly fighting my way up from the bottom, tired of feeling little and insignificant. I've worked and worked and worked. But I'm exhausted and I don't want to work anymore. Any time I've worked this hard, I've gotten what I wanted because I earned it. But this? This is the first time I've worked and ended up coming back to the bottom, over and over. I just need to rest now".

Her confessions rip through my heart like a dagger. I don't know how to console her, how to take away a pain that's been deep rooted in her since long before she met me. Except I've made it worse, the package that came with me made it worse. But I was too selfish to let her go, I couldn't lose her. I couldn't lose her over something as insignificant as my father or any one of those assholes inside that hotel. But I still didn't have the words to say to her that would make this all go away, so I kissed her.

I ran to her and grabbed her before she could leave. I took her face into my hands and I kissed her, hard. My mouth crashes onto hers in a searing display of passion and I felt it in every bone in my body. I didn't have the words, so I needed to show her that I wanted her. I wanted all of her so much it hurt.

She resisted at first, her anger and frustration wouldn't let her kiss me back. But I held on, my tongue invaded her mouth with a desperate need that only she could cure.

And then she gave in.

She gave into my longing and need for her. She ran her delicate fingers through my hair as I grabbed fistfuls of hers. We were lost in our moment, no one else mattered around us.