take it

25

I held my little sisters hand as the guys and I stood along with our lawyer- who was explaining everything that was going to go down.

Basically- they were going in claiming not guilty- which wasn't good in our spot.

I would have to speak on the stand- and my parents lawyer might end up pulling Allie to talk, but we basically had to just pray that they didn't.

The guys would be sitting directly behind us, close enough to where we could even touch them.

She had no idea how long it would take
She had no idea what they were going to ask or say against me

We were going into the situation blind- and that was scary to me, it was all scary.

But we had to do it.

The guys gave Allie and I big hugs, promising that everything would work out before they were led to the first row of seats.

Soon they called Allie and us in- security guards immediately stepping forward to lead us into the room.

I held Allie's hand tight, letting the judge swear me in before helping Allie when it came to being sworn in.

The security led us to our seats- Allie sitting close beside me, and I felt Calum's hand rub my shoulder gently, making me move my hand to immediately touch his also.

I held Allie's hand, watching as my parents entered- dressed nicer than I ever saw them dressed.
My dad looked very presentable- very much like a nice man, you would never suspect a child abuse charge against him.

We made eye contact right before they were sworn in and then I watched them walk to their seats- sitting beside their lawyer.

The judge spoke the background details of the case- basically introducing that it was a abuse charge and so on.

My parents got to start- so their lawyer stood, calling my dad to the bench.

He sat- pure confidence on his face.

"Do you recall any moments ever hitting your daughters?" He asked.

"Discipline wise, yes- both of my daughters were raised receiving spankings as discipline managements." He lied- this was never a spanking, it was a beating.

"Have you ever hit one of your daughters with the thought of hurting them- or abusing them?" She questioned him.

"No ma'am- I very much loved my daughters."

"What was your initial reaction to your daughter's doctor accusing you of abuse?"

"I was heartbroken- to not be a perfect father- but trying my hardest to be as perfect as I could be, and to be accused of purposefully hurting my daughters- it really, it hurt me"

After that- the questioning for him was done- so our lawyer got to ask him a few.

"You said in the last question that you never purposefully hurt your daughter" she spoke

"But here are some pictures that you might find familiar- this was the last beating that your oldest daughter, Christina had received- mind telling me how this happened?"

I watched his face go completely blank as he flipped through the pictures.

I looked to Allie, who was focused on my dad.

She looked at me after a moment- letting a small smile cover her lips.

I kissed her head gently, squeezing her hand lightly.

Questioned were asked back to back against my mom and dad.

Allie ended up fully asleep in my lap- her head tucked into my neck.

And that's when they called me to the stand.

I slowly stood- passing Allie to Calum carefully before walking to the stand.

I slowly sat- looking straight to my parents.

"Ivory" their lawyer spoke

"Did your father abuse you? Did he ever hit you besides discipline wise? And remember, there's a huge difference between an abusive hit and a discipline hit"

I knew what she was doing

She was trying to make me hesitate- trying to make me question what I really already knew.

I slowly reached over to grab one of the pictures from the beating- seeing a cut in my forehead gashed open.

I showed it to the lawyer

"This is a discipline hit?" I mumbled lightly.

"Him calling his friends over the beat me, that's discipline?" A tear slipped down my cheek

"Me fearing that I would die every fucking day, does that actually sound like discipline or abuse to you?" My voice cracked.

"Because if this sounds like fucking discipline- you need to experience it and then tell me how you feel after it." I finished slowly, wiping my tear, throwing the picture back into the corner it belonged in.

I watched the girl swallow- obviously not expecting my answer.

"If it was such a bad experience, why didn't you try to go get help?" She questioned slowly.

I narrowed my eyes at her

"Do you realize how many times he has almost killed me?" I mumbled out.

"Can you even begin to imagine what he would have done- or what he will do if I accuse him of abusing me and then he is let free, forcing me back into his custody?" I asked, looking towards the jury at this point.

"So you don't love your parents?" She asked.

And that was a hard question to answer

Because I did love my parents

But I didn't love my parents in the way that a teenage girl should love her parents

"I don't think love is the word to describe our family"