Lines Between Love and Hate

Never Again

Prepare on cuteness! Hope you enjoy.

(Warning: suicidal thoughts, fluff)

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Had he ever planned it like this? No, never. He had never even planned to end his own life. He had thought about, but never as in, he had intended to do it.  But never the less, here he was. Standing in his apartment with a knife to his throat. He felt numb. No tears, no shaking, just the cold metal on his skin. Just one movement and all this would be over. No more hate, no more hurting the people he loved, no more hurting his Louis. He took a deep breath and pushed the knife. "Harry!"

The scream made Harry open his eyes. Louis stood in the opening to the kitchen with his phone in his hand and his eyes big. His mouth was open and he stood frozen to the spot. Harry couldn't make himself move. The blade had barely gotten through his skin, but he couldn't make himself go on with Louis's pleading eyes on him. "Please go" Harry whispered.

It scared him how calm he sounded. No tremble, no nothing. Louis shook his head and a tear felt down his cheek. "Don't do this Harry. Put the knife down" Louis said with a hoarse voice, he took a slow step towards the younger boy.

"I have to do it" Harry mumbled.

Louis shook his head. "I'm so sorry for all I have done. I've never meant to hurt you this much. If I had known how sad you were I would never have done it".

More tears were now streaming down his face. "That why I have to do it. I'm making you sad" Harry said, only now feeling his eyes burn.

The sight of Louis, so unbelievable sad, made the fog disappear. The fog that had made him strong enough to get him where he stood now. Now when it was gone he felt small and broken again. Louis desperately shook his head. "No Harry. You make me happy. I love everything about you. Your humor, your voice, your smile. When we had that photoshoot where we had to carry you, I felt so lucky, because that meant I could touch you again and I had missed that so much. I got to play with you amazing hair like I used to. You remember?"

Harry slowly nodded, which painfully reminded him that he still had a sharp knife to his throat. He gasped when the knife cut deeper. "Please put it down. Let's talk" Louis whispered.

Harry hesitated, but then took it down, defeated. Louis sighed with relief and jumped forward to take the knife from him. He put it away for then to take a hold on Harrys arm, which made the boy gasp when he touched the cuts. Louis quickly released him and Harry pulled his arm up to his chest. "What's happening? you did that the last time too" Louis said shocked.

Harrys eyes turned watery again and he felt to his knees on the cold floor, holding his arms to his chest like to save his life. Louis just looked down at him in tears. What had happened to the happy go lucky boy he had met at the XFactor all that time ago? "It's okay Harry. I won't do anything, let me just quickly look at your neck "he said, his voice cracking in the end.

"You don't have to" Harry whispered so silent that Louis first wasn't sure he had heard anything.

"Have to what?" he asked confused, getting down on his knees to hear him.

"Pretend to care".

Louis could feel a lump in his throat. He needed to be strong for Harry, so he fought the tears. "Quit it" he said and helped the taller boy to his feet.

After quickly rinsing the blood away from where Harry had cut in the thin skin on his throat, they slowly walked to Harrys bedroom. Louis got Harry to lay down under the covers. "Can I?" he asked.

Harry slowly nodded. Louis smiled through the tears and also crawled under the blanket where he put his arms around the shivering Harry. The feeling of the younger boy in his arms almost made him explode. It felt so good. So safe. Harry buried his head under his chin and took a deep breath. He couldn't quite believe that this was really happening. Louis wanted more than anything to talk with Harry. He wanted to hear about all his troubles so he could make them go away. He wanted to punish himself for ever letting this perfect creature get so broken. He carefully kissed the top of the curly hair. "You wont leave?" a tired voice asked.

Louis closed his eyes and held on tighter. "Never again" he answered.

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Fluffy and cheesy, just as it should be. It feels so good to finally get to write some Larry. Prepare to get overwhelmed by cuteness overload.
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