The cover is great, red is one color that always draws the eye to it. Your blurb says just enough about the outline of your story, so that's good.
The plot is interesting and obviously, a murder mystery comes to my mind, and Sherlock Homes for some reason. Not a bad thing by the way.
The first chapter was enticing but the bit that describes herself while looking at her reflection in the mirror was not, it was cliche. It is the most overused way to introduce a character's appearance.
The rest of the story I noticed the dialog is boxed in with every paragraph, you should separate it so readers don't get confused on who is saying what. Also, the paragraphs in general are very long, it may be the layout for Wattpad that makes it look so long. Typically a paragraph is 5 sentences so try and see how that looks. There were little spelling mistakes but just proofreading can fix that. The story felt a little bit empty of emotion, especially from the main character and her situation. I'm not sure if you're planning to write more about her back story life later on so I won't say much about that.
The characters are different so you might want to express that more in some ways. Such as in the more recent chapter I read the different reactions but besides that nothing special to pull them apart. I did like that the main character is a reader that enjoys reading the genre of this story. What was greatly written was the present tense of the story, while in third person. That was unexpectedly pleasant when I started reading. It is getting better with each chapter, keep it up!
-Empress🐧
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Reviews from the Empire
Random✏ The title says it all. If you can handle a critic and the truth in your writing, then don't shy away. Do you want a review? Read on and find out how. (If CFC is at the top here, it means this review book is closed for catch-up.) 🐧 Book cover by...
