psychotic // l.h.

2 - scream

It had felt like weeks but had only been one day. Luke had left me alone in the room with a black hoodie of his that smelt strongly of expensive cologne. This was a typical kidnapping, attractive, seemingly innocent man, luring in women with his good looks, soft words and charm. He was the perfect kidnapper that no one would suspect to have a room in his basement where he tortured the women he took.

I had to admit, he was attractive in a twisted way. I knew that it was all just to make me feel a false sense of security but damn, it felt nice being held by him.

“Food’s downstairs.” I heard from the doorway and realized I had been sitting on the bed, staring at the pictures of me for far too long. He stood at the door, his posture stiff as always, never relaxed and his feet were on top of each other, it was kind of adorable.

“Ok.” I replied softly, standing up and following him downstairs to the kitchen. I was half scared that he would poison the food or and half afraid it would be something really odd. But I walked into the kitchen and all I could smell was pizza. Two boxes of dominos. The most normal pizza you could possibly get. I let out a sigh of relief and walked over to the table.

“You like pizza right? Of course you do, you get it every friday after work.” he said, half talking to himself as my eyebrows shot up and my stomach dropped as I remember that he watched me. He followed me, researched me, finding out about my family, finding picture of me that he drew on his fucking bedroom wall. I stared back at him, and he looked down.

“Don’t look at me like that.” He said, and sat down at the table, grabbing a piece of pizza.

“Luke, what am I going to tell my parents, my boss?” I asked, moving the chair to sit down. I didn’t want to make a move for the pizza and folded my hands firmly in front of me on the black marble tabletop. Luke abruptly stopped eating and looked up slowly.

“Are you trying to leave me?” he asked, swallowing with his eyes piercing into me. I shook my head quickly.

“No! No, Luke. Not at all. I just don’t want anyone to come looking for me and take me away. I should call them and say that I’m alright and with someone safe.” I said, trying to make it sound like an appealing idea for him.

“Or I could kill them.” He said, with a glint in his eye as he took another bite of pizza. I felt frozen, not knowing if he was bluffing or if he would seriously consider killing all those people.

“But then the police might find you, then they would definitely take me away from you.” I tried to reason with him, make this seem like the worst option possible.

“But you’re here cause you love me, you’re here because I love you. They wouldn’t take you away because we’re together.” He said, his eyes becoming confused. He didn’t know how scared I was, he didn’t understand what he was saying. I knew this wasn’t something a sane person would do, I knew there was something very wrong. An illness that made him this way.

“But Luke, you’ve hurt other people be-”

“I HURT THEM BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T LOVE ME. THEY DIDN’T UNDERSTAND ME. THEY WERE DIFFERENT FROM YOU.” He screamed and I quickly got out of my chair and backed across the kitchen as he started towards me. He got so close to me that could feel his breath on my neck and his nose was almost touching my cheek as I looked away from him.

“Look at me.” He said, pinning me against the counter behind me. I didn’t look at him, blinking back tears.

“Fucking look at me. Now.” he said loudly, making me let out a whimper. I finally looked at him, his eyes soft and caring. His body language said he wanted to hurt me but his eyes said he wanted to love me. His eyes scanned my face and he reached a hand up, tucking a hair behind my ear and leaning forward as if he were going to kiss me. I stiffened, I didn’t want to kiss him. But his mouth didn’t touch me except for a light brush that felt as if it was nothing. My eyes were clamped shut and I opened them slowly to see him worried.

“Are you still scared of me. You don’t have to lie. I wont be mad.” He said, trailing his fingers along my jaw and tracing patterns on the side of my neck. I nodded and his face dropped and he took a step back. He stood back quietly and started pacing, muttering words that jumbled together and made no sense. He started getting more frantic with his mumbles.

Then he looked back up at me and a scream erupted from his throat. I jumped back at the scream, my back hitting the counter.

“Luke?! What’s going on?” I begged, walking towards him and reaching out to touch him.

“Why does everyone hate me? Why am I scary?” He sobbed, now on the floor with his back against the table. I kneeled down next to him and lightly touched his shoulder but he flinched away. He scared the shit out of me but I knew it wasn’t his fault. He was raking his hands through his hair repeatedly and moving away from me slowly.

“I just don’t know you. I don’t hate you at all.” I said, trying to move towards him.

“But I know you.” Luke said in between sobs.

“I just need time to get to know you. You don’t scare me, I’m just worried about you.” I said, he stopped moving and looked up at me with a blank expression. We stayed like that, looking at each other and I looked at his hairline, small bloody nail marks from him raking through his hair harshly.

“Luke, you’re bleeding. Can you let me fix it?”

“Ok.” He said quietly and I moved to the sink, grabbing a cloth and wetting it with warm water. I kneeled down in front of him, tilting his head up to look at me before dabbing lightly along his hairline. He moved away once or twice, water leaking into the cuts and making them sting. I wiped away the water that dripped down softly and he stared at me like a child stares at a mother bandaging their knee after they fell off a bike. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t slept in years and I guessed he hadn’t. Everything about him was stiff and sharp.

“Thank you.” He muttered, his expression blank and emotionless as I nodded and moved back to wash the cloth in the sink.

“You’re wonderful.” He said and I turned to look down at him, giving him a soft smile that he returned. He was tired and his eyes were already drooping.

“Do you want to go to bed?” I asked him and he nodded before pushing up off the ground and taking me hand in his before leading me upstairs. His Hands were gentle with me, at least at the moment while he was calm. He pulled me into the bedroom and went through the scratched up wardrobe that had drawings covering it as well. He was good at drawing, the sketches were messy and crazy and I couldn’t help but admire their chaotic beauty.

“Do you want a flannel?” he asked, pulling out a red and black checkered one but I shook my head, tucking your hands into the hoodie you were still wearing. He nodded and climbed into bed with his jeans still on.

“You’re going to wear your jeans?”

“Well, you’re still wearing yours.” he replied, as if it was obvious. He pulled the covers open for me and then it clicked in my head that I was getting in bed with someone who had taken me only hours ago.

“I wont touch you. You don’t have to be near me. I just want to know you’re there.” Luke said, knowing I was torn. So I slid into the bed, the covers were cold and the fabric of the pillow was scratching against my cheek. I felt like crying, the weight of the day suddenly hitting me. But I had had enough crying today, I was done with being a damsel in distress.

“Goodnight.” You said quietly, turning away from him.

“Goodnight, honey.” He said, before silence fell over the room as strangers fell asleep together.