Jack's POV:
I slowly stand up, my eyes locked on his the entire time. I don't know what I'm searching for in the brown depths, but I guess I'm just looking for something- anything- that will tell me that I assumed wrong. The regret and fear written all over his face doesn't do much in my favor, though.
"Lex-"
"No!" he interrupts. "Nothing happened after what you saw at the lockers, why would you even think that? Oh wait, maybe you didn't. Crap, forget I said anything."
"Something happened."
"No, Jack, nothing happened."
"You can't keep lying to me if this is going to work."
He sighs, directing his gaze toward the ground. His breathing starts to get irregular, which I know is the start of one of his panic attacks. "He didn't rape me, if that's what you think happened. I promise. He tried but failed. Please believe me. I told him no and I pushed him away and it didn't work and he only stopped because a teacher found him. I wouldn't ever try to hurt you like that on purpose, please understand it wasn't willingly, I'm so sorry..." he trails off, letting himself fall back onto the bench and cry.
I sit beside him and gently pull him to me, partially because I know he's bruised and also because of what happened earlier- he might not be ready for too much physical contact.
But he kissed me...
He clutches to my shirt, shaking violently and barely breathing in the thick of his attack. I push him back to hold him by his shoulders, trying to steady him. "Breathe, Alex, you need to breathe." He doesn't listen, and I'm starting to get scared that he'll pass out. "C'mon, for me, please breathe. In, out. In, out." He starts to listen, trying to regulate his breathing despite his crying.
A few minutes of this pass, and he throws himself into my arms again. I wrap my arms around him tightly, knowing he needed support right now. Whoever put their hands on him is going to get their ass kicked- well, I know who it is, but not their name. Anger bubbles up inside me, but subsides when Alex ever so gently presses his lips to mine, completely different from when he kissed me at my house earlier.
"I don't expect you to trust me after what has happened between us, but I want you to know that I'm gonna keep fighting for this," he mumbles after separating his lips from mine slightly, pressing our foreheads together.
"As you once told me, it's in the past now," I reply, kissing him again.
-=+=-
It's quickly 4 a.m., indicating that Alex and I probably needed to get back home.
"Do we have to?" he whines, looking at me innocently.
"Yes, darling, we have to go home," I reply, chuckling slightly.
He suddenly gets dead serious, adjusting himself on the bench so he's fully facing me. "Remember, no one can see us together. We can't hang out at school or even after school, and if we meet, it has to be really late, like now."
"What about sleep?"
"Damn... I guess we can't meet every day," he murmurs. Silence falls between us for a few seconds when an idea pops into my head.
"What about weekends? I can say I'm hanging out with my friends Zack and Rian, and you're kind of friends with Zack, so we can all hang out in a group!"
"I can't even be friends with you, Jack, so that won't work."
"No one has to know, and Zack and Rian won't tell a soul."
He hesitates momentarily before he gives in, saying, "Fine, but it's risky." He pulls my head to his shoulder, wrapping his arms around my back. "If I had this my way, I'd scream it to the world that we were together, because you make me so happy, Jack. But I can't do that, and I know you don't know why, but it's not my fault."
"I know, babe, I just wish you could tell me."
"I'd love to tell you. I want to tell you so bad, but I can't do that to you. One day the truth will have to be disclosed, but until then, just know you are the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I can't show it that much yet, but I mean it."
I pull away from his shoulder and kiss him briefly before standing up, holding out my hand for him to take. He doesn't take it, and instead he just stares at it.
"Can we lay here together for a few minutes?" he asks sweetly.
"Fine, but only for a few minutes," I reply, sighing. I always give in to him- it's nearly impossible not to.
He gets up and lays on the mostly dead grass, rolling onto his back and patting his chest, signaling me to lay there. I lay beside him and put my head there, but it doesn't seem to satisfy him. He takes his arm and pulls me so I'm laying mostly on top of him, wrapping his arms around me. I sigh with a slight smile playing on my lips and nestle my head a few inches below his chin.
"Jack?" he murmurs, kissing the top of my head.
"Lex?"
"I lo-"
"Jack? Jack, honey, where are you?" says a familiar voice that I recognize to belong to my mother. I jump up as Alex takes off in a run, not a single word between us as we part ways.
I approach her, pretending like I'd been sleeping. "Hey, Mom, I'm sorry I snuck out, I needed some fresh air and ended up falling asleep out here."
"You must be freezing!" she exclaims, wrapping her arm around my shoulders. "I understand why you're upset, but please, tell me next time," she says quieter.
"Wait, you'll let me do it?"
"I suppose, maybe not every night but some nights I don't see why not. You're fifteen, you've proven to be responsible... to a point."
"I know, I'm sorry."
"It's okay."
"Can I ask something of you, though?"
"I suppose."
"Can Dad not know about me sneaking out at night? I feel like he wouldn't like the idea, plus he's been trying to keep me home as much as possible lately."
"I wasn't planning on telling him anyway. He's been acting weird lately," she says, chuckling a little. "Shall we go home now?" she asks. I nod sleepily, walking with her back home in the starlight.
YOU ARE READING
You Broke Me, You Saved Me (Jalex)
Fanfiction-COMPLETED- - trigger warnings in first chapter "Let's get to my house, we need to get you warm," he says. I look at him, and he's soaking wet. He's only wearing a short sleeve shirt with skinny jeans, since he gave me the sweatshirt he was wearing...
