Chapter 61

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Emma

Four days had passed since Dawood left for New York, and I hadn't heard from him since, except for a text he sent me when he reached there.

Even though Natasha and Mehmet Ordimez tried their best to make me feel welcome, I wasn't comfortable invading their space. I should have insisted to Dawood that I stay at the penthouse instead of his father's estate.

My classes were still off because of the winter break, and I had nothing to do but roam around the estate grounds. I struggled to eat, and even if I succeeded in eating something, it didn't last long, as I would throw up everything after a few minutes.

Natasha had asked several times why I was not eating properly, and I blamed it on my exhaustion. From her expressions, it was clear that she didn't believe a word I said, but she didn't pry further. I was feeling ashamed to tell her about the pregnancy.

How could I?

When Dawood and I weren't on the same page, he made it clear that he didn't want the baby. How would Natasha and Mehmet Ordimez react to learning about my pregnancy? Would they convince Dawood to keep the baby? Or would they convince me to abort the baby at Dawood's behest?

The way Babanne was excited by the prospect of seeing Dawood and my kids, I was sure she would be ecstatic by the news, but would she be happy after knowing her grandson didn't want kids?

I wanted to talk to someone so badly. I needed someone to tell me I was right to want to keep the baby. Attaining motherhood was the most significant moment in any woman's life. Allah created us different from men for the purpose of recreation. Then how could Dawood ask me to give up something that was a vital part of my existence?

I was on the verge of a breakdown when I last spoke to Mom. I wanted to tell her about my pregnancy, but I wanted to talk to Dawood first. If Dawood still insisted on me to get an abortion, I would have no choice but to leave him. Until then, I needed to keep it a secret from everyone even though I wanted to cherish it and celebrate it.

Would Mom and Abi be happy for me? Would Abi allow me to leave Dawood? No one ever got divorced in our family, and if it were up to the elders in the family, no one ever would. Everyone expected the girls to adjust to their married life and stay with their husbands.

The reason for Dawood and my marriage was a sore subject in Azmaayir. If I get divorced, the family reputation might only worsen. I held my head in my hand, unable to think straight, as I sat on a bench at my favorite spot in the garden when a car halted on the porch.

Mehmet Ordimez walked out of the car and hurried into the house. I wondered what had happened but stayed at my spot, enjoying the afternoon sunshine. The winter was mild that year, and the snowfall was average compared to the last year.

I rubbed my palms together to heat my hands and watched the sun play hide and seek with Earth.

Though the grounds were covered with snow that time of year, I still enjoyed being outdoors rather than staying inside. Azmaayir, being an Arab country, it never snowed there. We used to go to Europe for vacation, and I loved playing in the snow making a snowman.

Mohammed and I would make the snowman, gathering snow, and when we would have completed it, Ahmed would smash it. He always had a penchant for breaking things. At one point, it increased to the extent that Abi assigned him to one of the construction sites where old buildings were brought down to clear the ground and make new ones.

When Ahmed returned from there, covered in dirt, his eyes would glint. I would have been scared of him if he wasn't my brother. Ahmed never hesitated to express how much he enjoyed breaking walls with his hammer. Once, I tried lifting his hammer but couldn't move it an inch. It was too heavy for my liking, and hence, I named it Mjollnir (Thor's hammer).

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