Story Plot Ideas | [Vol. 1]

My First Author's Note

Hello everyone!

I just wanted to thank everyone who has supported me continuously throughout the entire of this year. It has been a bit of a rough year for me, so all your votes and comments have been wonderful encouragement.

I also cannot begin to thank all of you enough for 3.66k READS!!!

I entered a new school this year, with high hopes and lots of enthusiasm. I went through the year with a enormous, twisting and turning and looping and diving, rollercoaster of emotions.

At first, it was far too much for me to handle, so I dived into a series of anxiety/panic attacks at least once a day. This went on for almost two months.

A friend of mine, whom I once believed would understand my predicament, was diagnosed with severe depression and an eating disorder a short while before me. At one point, she was also harming herself.

She treated me like sh*t during my struggle and I didn't know it at the time, but she was making me worse. My self-esteem was dropping rapidly and all confidence or happiness was draining out of me at an alarming rate. For a few months in the year, I became a shell of who I once was.

I felt nothing. I smiled at people still, I laughed forcibly at jokes. And I woke up every day wishing for all of it to end. There were many times when I sat at my dining table, facing my balcony.

And I just fantasized about climbing up on that railing and taking a leap.

A leap that would take away all the pain, the anxiety, and endless days that I just wished would end sooner.

I woke up everyday just wanting to go back to sleep already. I read books, never really absorbing anything. I ate, but it was all tasteless to me. It felt like a show. A show that I had to continue, so that I wouldn't make my parents worry.

Finally, a wonderful girl in my class decided to make friends with me. Our friendship slowly pulled me out of my pit of hopelessness. I felt excited and genuinely happy to wake up again.

I was eating and enjoying the tastes again. I was listening to my favorite music, and I was dancing and singing along. I reread all the books that I didn't read properly, and I just stopped thinking about jumping off that ledge. Or dragging that penknife across my wrists.

I was better.

I still have occasional anxiety attacks though, but I'm working on it. I've also started to loosen up a little and stop trying to be so much of a control freak. And I've also stopped trying to make myself puke after every meal.

This year has been rough, but I couldn't be more thankful for the people who have helped me through this.

I pulled through. So if there are any of you guys out there, who's struggling, please remember that there will always be light at the end of every tunnel.

If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here and listening.

Peace!
Vel's out!