Fools Fall

End 35- Sam

Sam

June

(NSFW)

"Mmm," I moaned against his mouth as he hit that certain stop over and over, his tongue was the only sloppy part, everything else he did was gentle and planned out. Like his hands that caressed my body or the way his hips moved rhythmically against mine as he fucked me from below.

I sat up, my hand sliding down his smooth, hairless chest that I wasn't used to, and I ground myself against him. Being on top and in control, I found, was the only way I'd cum.

But Ben liked it when I was in control, so it worked out for the most part.

The rest of my senior year was bleak and to say I was depressed would be an understatement. Noah breaking up with me in November was just the beginning.

Then came the downfall in my friendship with Elliot. It was at school. I had been crying, tears of self pity drowning me all night, so the following day when Elliot stormed up to me, I already had a migraine from crying so much. "Carter?"

I sighed into my locker, regretting letting my mom force me to come to school. But I needed to deal with this, apologize for my mistake. I shut my locker and turned to Elliot who struggled to look pissed, but looked more crushed and heartbroken. "You knew I was going to tell him how I felt," Elliot spoke like he couldn't believe what I had done.

"I know, I'm so sorry, Elliot. It didn't mean anything," I felt like that was the only phase I knew how to speak that entire week. But what else could I say? No excuse mattered, what happened, happened and there was no going back.

"To you," he exclaimed with his eyes watering, "What kind of friend does that?" I didn't know how to respond, so instead, I swallowed the lump in my throat and couldn't look at him. "That's all you had to say? You're sorry?"

Just get on your knees and apologize profusely, Sam. But I did nothing. Elliot scoffed, "Fuck you, Sam." And that was the end of Elliot talking to
me and because of that, Carla stopped talking to me.

Carter and I still talked a bit, but it was mainly my fault for us having a fallout. I didn't feel like I deserved to stay friends with him, it felt wrong. During thanksgiving, I stayed home while my old friends and Carter went to their traditional lake house. I heard Noah went thinking Carter and I weren't going and when he saw Carter, they both got into a fight. I feel horrible knowing I ruined their friendship.

So yeah, depression induced by my own self guilt and grieving over the lose of Noah and two of my good friends, hit me like a wrecking ball. But I dived into working and making as much money as I could. It wasn't fun working nonstop, but it had it's perk other than the paycheck.

Ben.

He worked almost as much as I did alongside me at the movie theater and made my days suck a little less until April when he kissed me after hours and I said yes to being his boyfriend. Ben was my safe haven.

Being with him was a dramatic change from my previous relationship. No more petty arguments even when I tried to start one, Ben remained calm and said something like, "Let's just see each other tomorrow and we can talk then." He didn't always get my humor and sometimes took my sarcasm too seriously, but he was kind and gentle with me. Especially in bed.