Lay Low

Chapter Thirty Three

I woke to a knocking on the door.   I pulled the covers up to my neck, making sure my now damaged upper arm was covered.

"Yeah" I grunted.

Max came in looking tired.

"What time did you get in last night?"

"Dunno"  I replied softly.  All the images from last night flashed through my head.  How I had grabbed Lyla.  The feeling of relief when I cut into myself.

He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed.  I felt weary as I waited for him to shout at me for smoking, for coming in late, for how I was lately.

"Rough night?"

His question took me by surprise: I was waiting for a tirade.

"Yeah."

"You want to talk about it?"

I shook my head.  I was too ashamed to talk about what had happened.   What I had done.

"Ok" he paused. "Breakfast is almost ready, if you want to join us..."

"Ok" I conceded.  I hadn't done much with them over the last few weeks and I suddenly felt guilty.

"Kai will be happy." He stood up, smiling. "So will I"

He walked to the door and turned.

"Oh Jake, you are grounded by the way."

I nodded my head, unsurprised.

"For smoking?"

"For walking out and smoking" he replied.

"Ok" I sighed "Fair enough".   That was the least punishment I deserved.

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Monday:  I wasn't looking forward to school.  Or more accurately; seeing Lyla.  I hadn't rang her yesterday as I just couldn't find the words.  I could only manage a text.

I didn't mean to.  I'm sorry.  I love you.

She replied.

I know you didn't.  It is ok.  I love you too.

I hoped that would be enough said about it, but I doubted it.

I shuffled out of the school building and into the playground.  I hadn't run into her or Chris so far this morning and now it was morning break time.  I looked up and saw her from across the Quad.  As I was contemplating avoiding her, she saw me and waved.  Shit.   Nowhere to run now.  I walked towards her.

She peeled off from her friends, several of whom gave me dirty looks.  I wondered what they had been telling her.   'Stay away from him, he is bad news.'  Her closest gal pal, pulled her arm.

"Do you want me to stay?" I made out her saying.

"No I am fine, don't be silly" I heard Lyla reply.

Her friend raised an eyebrow at me and turned on her heel.  I felt colour rise in my cheeks.

"Hey babe" she said with a big smile plastered on her face.  She threw her arms around me.

My shame increased.  She was so loving and forgiving.  How could I treat her so badly?  I don't deserve someone like her.  I buried my face in her shoulder as we hugged for a long time.