Rolling over on the couch, I lean my head over the side gently, just to see her.
She's rolled over on her side, her back to me, the fabric of her t-shirt stretching over the delicate curve of her back. The blanket has fallen in her sleep, sliding down to her thighs, below her shorts. I reach an arm over, carefully grabbing the blanket, and pull it up and over her, laying it down over her waist, letting my hand linger for just a moment before pulling it back, slowly, so as not to wake her.
She rolls over, startling me, and her eyes flutter- her wide, beady eyes- coming to focus on my hand, just dangling over her bed. She smiles at me, a tight-lipped smile where she looks at me through her lashes- that drives me crazy I mean oh my gosh- her eyes twinkling in the fire light.
"Couldn't sleep?" She whispers, her fingers finding mine, an action so simple to her, yet it means so much to me. The comfort of her hand in mine, it feels like that could get me through anything, like I'm relaxed at her touch. She calms me down by doing nothing at all, just her presence alone is enough to help, to calm the anxiety that consumes me, to make the impending waves of unease seem like trickles of water.
"N-No." And I'm not lying, after the events today there's no way I could sleep, because, how could I? When it nearly happened, when my lips- my stuttering, inexperienced lips- nearly touched hers? But maybe she didn't know, I don't think she would have wanted to kiss me, if she knew those were my intentions, she probably didn't know, I wasn't clear enough, I should have been more clear- but maybe that would have ruined it, if she had known, she would have pulled away, and she wouldn't have talked to me, and-
"Nathan, Nathan what's wrong? Breathe, just breathe." Her voice brings me out of my thoughts, realizing I'm breathing hard, that my heart is pounding.
Emma sits up, her hand still in mine, resting them together on the side of the couch, and lays her chin on them, just near my elbow.
"What's wrong Nathan?" The little jump start my heart does whenever she says my name has me flinching, continuously shocked by the affect she has on me.
"Um...j-just, no-noth-nothing." I chicken out at the last minute, to embarrassed to voice my thoughts and too scared to hear her answer to them.
"That's not nothing Nathan." She strokes her thumb across my knuckles, her skin soft against mine.
I remain silent, watching her, her long, tendrils of blonde hair and her big wide eyes searching mine, and her delicately slim shoulders, curved in a way that's beautiful. My eyes trace the hollows of her collar bones, the slender curve of her neck, and her soft jawline, my mind mentally taking notes as I do.
I'm surprised when she sits up on the edge of the couch, the blanket falling away from her, leaving her legs pale and bear and curvy in the light of the fire glowing in the hearth. I look away in shame, my eyes downcast to our entwined hands.
With her free hand, she starts tracing the veins in my forearm, her finger moving up and down along my wrist, light as a feather yet highly noticeable, the only thing I can even think about. It causes goosebumps to rise on my arms and I pray that she can't see them- I mean please, dear God, for my sake- but she does, and instead of laughing or making some snide joke about it like most people would, she smiles at me, leaning down to kiss the inside of my wrist.
Oh good God - and my heart is going wild, my cheeks flaming up even though she means nothing by it, how could she when I look they way I do- hideous. I wonder if she could feel my pulse under her lips, if she could tell that it went into overdrive, that I'm running on all cylinders from just the touch of her lips on my skin.
YOU ARE READING
Love, Emma
Teen Fiction"E-Emma? It's okay y-you know. I-I'm used to i-i-it." "You shouldn't have to be, some people disgust me, the nerve of them." "I can't blame t-t-th-them, I m-mean l-l-l-look at m-me." He sounds so defeated, even though I can tell he's trying to hide...
