Loud Like Love

Chapter Sixteen: Purify

Nick's mobile rang. It was Mel.

'Hey! You ready for Manchester?'

'Hey, Mel. 'Course I am!'

He could practically hear her smile. 'Can't wait to see you again. And can't wait to see Placebo! Though I'm guessing I'm not half as excited about it as you are.'

Nick laughed. 'Probably not. Anything in particular I need to bring, you think?'

'Clothes? Toothbrush? I hear toothbrushes are good to bring when you're travelling.'

'Typically, yes.' Nick put his favourite Placebo t-shirt in his bag, to wear to the concert. It was an old one he'd found online about three years ago. It had been catastrophically large on him at the time, but he was quite a bit taller now, and his frame had filled out a little, so now it was simply comfortably loose. He liked how it looked on him.

He'd be lying if he said he didn't care about how he looked for the concert. For one, there was always the remote possibility that Brian Molko would actually look at him and he would die on the spot, in which case he'd like to leave a beautiful corpse if at all possible. For another, Dave was going to be there.

He wasn't hoping, not really. Since Matt's birthday party, he and Dave had gone for coffee twice. It had been nice. They could speak together as friends, and the idea of an hour and a half long train ride alone with Dave did not fill Nick with dread in the way it might have a couple of months ago. Their relationship had progressed into a tentative friendship, one which Nick was happy to pursue further. He had given up on more, though he still thought about it, and seeing Dave always filled him with a thrill that made his heart race and ache, all at once.

'Well, I guess I have everything I need, then. Really excited!'

'Me too.' Mel was silent for a moment. 'Hey . . . are you sure you're okay with staying at my parents' house with Dave there? It won't feel awkward for you?'

Her concern was touching and Nick smiled. 'Probably, but it'll be fine. You'll be there too.'

'I will,' she said. 'Okay. I should go. I'll see you tomorrow.'

'Yup. See you then!'

Nick went through his mental checklist one more time. He should have everything he needed now, so he closed his bag and sat down on the bed. He was filled with nervous excitement. Even though Dave and Mel had bought the tickets nearly a year ago, when the tour dates had been announced, it still didn't seem quite real. He had wanted to see them for what felt like his whole life, and now he would. He wanted to be there early. He wanted to be all the way in the front. If he could do that, could be that close, he thought he could die happy.

* * *

The train from Birmingham New Street to Manchester Piccadilly took exactly one hour and twenty-eight minutes, during which time Nick talked non-stop about the concert. Dave could tell he was nervous. It was adorable. Dave felt a pang of sadness to think of what this trip could have been like if all the things that had happened, hadn't. If he and Nick were still together, they'd be holding hands right now.

Mellie greeted them at the station, giving them both long hugs, but Nick the longest.

'I can't believe I haven't seen you in, what, a year? How is that a thing?'

Nick laughed. 'It's good to see you too.'

They took the bus to Uncle Clive's house. As a diplomat, he did well for himself, and he hadn't exactly been poor before either; he and Dave's mother had had a blessed upbringing. The house was quite grand.