to live for the hope of it all.

Chapter 44

December 24th, 2023

"Could you find a way to let me down slowly?
A little sympathy, I hope you can show me..."

Bailey

"Another one!" Caleb shouted, and I turned to glare at him playfully from where I sat at the piano.

"Caleb, my fingers are about to fall off," I laughed, standing and moving to sit by Beau on the floor. He rolled on his back then and I smiled before rubbing his belly. "I'll play more tomorrow."

"Fine," he groaned, placing a card down on the table in front of him where he and Wren sat playing a game.

"Alright kiddos," Jenna said, standing and pulling her husband with her. "We're headed to bed. We'll see y'all in the morning."

A chorus of "goodnight's" and "Merry Christmases" were thrown back at them from where we all sat. And a few minutes later, Anna departed to her room where Delilah already slept.

Grandpa Matt sat on the recliner, his eyes closed but a content and tired smile on his face as we all talked around him. Eventually, he let out a yawn and I moved to go poke his shoulder.

"What is it, Bay?" He asked, popping one eye open.

"Go to bed, it's late anyways," I said. "Wren and I are probably gonna head up soon."

"Kicking me out already?" He joked, standing from his chair. "I'm too old to hangout with the cool kids?"

"The opposite actually," I laughed, grabbing his forearm to walk with him. "We're not cool enough to hangout with you."

"Bailey, let go," he mumbled, shaking my arm off. "I'm good. I can get there."

I frowned as he straightened before he met my eyes. I was worried about him and had been watching him like a hawk since his leg gave out on the stairs.

It wasn't the first time it's happened in the last few months, and it only made me worry more.

"Bailey, get out of your head," he smiled, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "I'll see you in the morning. Merry Christmas, I love you."

"Merry Christmas," I smiled softly. "I love you too."

I watched as he headed off in the direction of his bedroom before closing the door shut behind him. I sighed before turning around and meeting my best friend's eye.

"I'm gonna head up to bed," I said, pointing towards my grandfather's room. "He likes to wake up early Christmas morning."

"I'll come with you," Wren said, dropping the cards on the table in front of her. "I'm tired of beating him anyways."

"Whatever," Caleb scoffed, but a smile made its way onto his face. I turned to Beckett then, giving him a soft smile before heading upstairs, Wren right behind me.

Things have been off with Beckett and I since Monday, and I could tell he felt it too. I'd felt rejected whenever I watched his eyes build up that same barrier I saw Wren's do just days before.

After he'd been the one to comfort me the first time, I was at a loss now that he was the one shutting me out. But I didn't know how to ask him about it without pushing the topic, so instead I waited for him to come to me about it.

But that was a week ago.

And Beckett hadn't brought it up. The first few days, he and Caleb went snowboarding while Wren and I rode the gondola rides up and down the mountains, so we barely saw each other aside from breakfast and dinner.