Chapter 113

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Part 2...

Becs took a deep breath and signed.
I hope I don't live to regret that.
'All done?' Carol asked as she handed her and Viv's paperwork over.
'Yeah.'
'Let me just check you haven't missed anything.' Carol said lightly, but Becca couldn't help noticing that she checked them very closely, especially the NDA.
'No, that's all correct.' She continued, smiling at Becca, then tapped away at her computer.
'Hello? Is that Zac Patterson?' She said into her headset. 'This is Carol from Administration. I've got Becs Smith and Viv James here for Mr Evans.'
Becca felt her stomach flip.
Oh God. Mr Evans.
It's all different here - he's not just the Chris I know. He's Chris Evans, global superstar.
Carol paused for a second, listening, then ended the call.
'Someone will be here shortly to collect you.' She said to Becca.
'Thanks.'
Becca walked back to Viv. 'Zac'll be here soon.'
She sat down and tried to distract herself by reading some magazines, but she couldn't concentrate, her mind racing at a million miles an hour.
'You okay?' Viv asked her.
No.
'Not really.' Becca admitted.
'I didn't think so - you've flicked through that same magazine five times in the last three minutes. Are you nervous about going on set?'
'No...I mean...yeah I am, but...' Becca trailed off, unsure how to put it into words.
'What?'
Becca rubbed her hands over her face, trying to get her thoughts in order. 'I was a bit nervous before anyway, but now I'm here and there's all the fans and the security and signing NDAs where they threaten to sue you for hundreds of thousands of pounds, it's all a bit...'
'A bit real?' Viv asked gently.
'A bit...much.' Becca admitted. 'And it's freaking me out a bit. I mean, that guy jumped in front of the car? I could have hit him!'
'I know, but you didn't.'
'But what kind of person does that on purpose? Who jumps in front of a moving car because they think a famous person's inside? That's insane.'
'Not arguing with you there.'
'But that's Chris's life all the time - that level of celebrity and fans going crazy wherever he goes.'
'Well, yeah.' Viv agreed. 'You already knew that though - it's not like he's a regular guy.'
'No, he isn't.' Becca said seriously.
'Imagine having to deal with that all the time!' She blurted out. 'And it would be all the time if you were with Chris - you could never have a normal life with him, because he's not normal.'
'He's not.' Viv agreed. 'But that's not to say-'
'I mean, just being seen in public with him when that happened? I'd be so embarrassed.'
That much attention would just be my worst nightmare.
'Okay, take a deep breath, you're working yourself up into a state.' Viv said, firmly.
'Yeah, you're right, sorry.' Becca said, forcing herself to calm down.
'And anyway, you've been out in public with him a few times - was it that bad? Did he get swarmed with crazed fans?'
'Well, no.' Becca admitted in a small voice.
'In fact, you had a nice time.'
'Yeah.'
'Well then. Just relax and stop overthinking everything.'
'Sorry Viv. I am overthinking it a bit, aren't I?'
'Yes.'
'Sorry, it's just being here's a bit overwhelming.' Becca admitted. 'I'd have been better if he'd called and I'd known who's going to be there and what's going to happen.'
Or just that everything's okay.
'Well, how about you try to stop thinking those thoughts and just enjoy the day?' Viv said, giving her a small hug. 'I mean, how many people get to look round a Marvel set?'
'Yeah, you're right. Thanks Viv. I'm so glad you're here to keep me sane.'

Five minutes earlier...
'Cut!' The director's irritated voice rang out. 'Reset again, dammit.'
Shit!
He'd messed up again.
'Evans, come on man!' Even the normally chill Ruffalo sounded exasperated.
He was fucking it all up - his lines, his placement, his timings. He couldn't concentrate on anything except the fact that Becs was due any minute.
Chris swallowed against the lump in his throat.
I don't wanna do this. I don't wanna have that conversation.
'Mate! Are we gonna get this scene in the bag sometime this year?' Hemsworth called from the side.
'We're gonna ban you from drinking again, if this is what happens.' Bettany joked.
He'd let them think it was a hangover - easier than explaining the truth.
'Everyone back in ten minutes.' The director called. 'And Evans? Sort your shit out.'
'Right. Sorry.'
'Don't be sorry, just fix it!'
Right. Just fix it. Easy.
Everyone moved off with varying degrees of muttered annoyance.
'What's up, Dorito?' Rob asked, looking concerned.
'Nothing. I'm fine.' He gritted. 'Just hungover.'
More people were coming in now, expecting to shoot the next scene - Scarlett was walking over to them and he could see Mackie by the door.
'Hey.' Scarlett smiled at them both. 'I thought I was gonna be late - Rose lost her favourite doll and was absolutely inconsolable - we had to turn the whole house upside down to find it. I've left Colin clearing up.'
'Lucky Colin.' Rob joked.
Chris zoned out their conversation and glanced over at the clock on the wall - 9.58.
I wonder if Becs is here yet - somewhere on site?
He vaguely heard Rob say his name and looked up - they were both watching him, waiting for a response.
'Huh? What?' He said, having no idea what they'd said.
'Nothing important.' Rob replied. But Chris didn't miss the concerned look that passed between them. 'Well, I gotta take a whizz. Be right back.' Rob added.
'Way too much information, Rob.' Scarlett laughed.
'So, how's it been going here this morning?' She added.
'Fine.' He replied, not meeting her eye.
'Word on the street is that you got absolutely wasted last night, and you've been messing up all your cues today.' She continued, and when he glanced over, she was watching him closely.
She knows that's not true.
He could tell by the way she was looking at him.
'Yeah, well Mackie does it all the time and no one bats an eyelid.' He grumbled.
She paused for a moment. 'Is that really what happened? Because I know last night you were going to-'
'I don't want to talk about it.'
'It's just-'
'Scar, I said I don't want to talk about it!' He snapped. 'Just leave it!'
I can't talk about it - I'm only just holding it together as it is.
'Hey guys!'
Chris looked up and Zac was standing there.
Oh God.
Is this it? Is she here?
He felt his pulse race as he scanned the room, but he couldn't see her.
'Are you on a break? That's good timing - I just got a call from Administration to say your guests are ready to collect.' Zac told him.
His stomach lurched.
'Oh, Becs is here?' Scar sounded pleased.
Yeah. Here to tell me that she's in love with someone else.
'Yeah.' His voice caught in his throat.
'Well, I just wanted to let you know that I'm now going to get them.' Zac said.
'No. I'll do it.' Chris said.
At least that way I won't be looking at the door every two seconds until she arrives.

It only took a couple of minutes for him to walk through the corridors to the back door of the administration office. He'd paused for a second to take a few deep breaths, when he heard Becs' voice.
Did she just say my name?
He listened harder.
'Well, yeah.' He heard Viv say. 'You already knew that though - it's not like he's a regular guy.'
'No, he isn't.' Becca replied.
What are they talking about?
He waited and Becs spoke again. 'Imagine having to deal with that all the time!'
What does she mean? What's 'that'? Is she talking about my anxiety?
Becs continued. 'And it would be all the time if you were with Chris - you could never have a normal life with him, because he's not normal.'
He stood there, reeling, unable to believe what he'd just heard.
Not normal?
I can never have a normal life, because I'm not normal?
That's what she thinks of me?
'He's not.' Viv agreed.
She's told her friends?
'I mean, just being seen in public with him when that happened? I'd be so embarrassed.'
Embarrassed?
She said she didn't care about the anxiety!
But all this time she's been lying to me?
He shook his head, his heart breaking a little more.
I can't do this.
I can't deal with this right now.

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