The Hate Between Us (Percabeth&Solangelo)

Chapter Nineteen - And Strangers Again

Piper POV:

Look in the mirror, tell me what do you see?

A fucking mess, that's what. Eyes too puffy with sadness to ever be considered pretty, skin red and stained wet with tears, long flowing hair that irritates me so much I just want to... have to... need to... cut it all off. I grab my scissors angrily and hack away at it until I'm satisfied with its messiness. Good, people will stop complimenting it now. What have I done? I look nothing like my Mother now, gods rest her soul. She had been so beautiful, I grieve for her, long for her to be by my side now because she would have known exactly what to say to me in this moment.

I see a girl too tired to think of school at this moment, too confused to think about the future in which she definitely does not want to be an actress – like her father – because gods know she hates the idea of it. But she can't think about that now, not when her mind is too absorbed at the news given to her last week by her best friend, about the boyfriend who she had thought was amazing. He's all she can think about now – for all the wrong reasons. The cheater, the liar, the boy who couldn't see that her love for him was enough.

I see a girl who is more lost than ever. No idea of who she is or what she will become, not least because she had almost cheated on the boy that had cheated on her, and she couldn't decide whether that made them equals or not. She has to confront him, has to confront herself, but then where will that lead her? Alone.

She doesn't want to be alone.

I sat alone in my bedroom, staring at my reflection which now looks so different, ignoring my phone which buzzed constantly on top of the desk. Probably Annabeth texting me. I'm too tired to lift my arm and reach for is. I'll just have to reply to her later.

Instead I run my fingers through my hair, twirling away at the space where my long curls had once been. I still remember the feeling of Shel running her hands through my thick locks, her face so close to mine, her eyes staring back at me with an expression I wanted so desperately to be love. Again, a wave of guilt washes over me at the thought of that moment; at the way I think about it now. I had been so close to kissing her... but I had held back. Because I love Jason – loved Jason. I can't believe how much things had changed since then.

'Can you make up your mind or not?'

Shel had asked me that once, and not long after the question had been posed I thought I finally had made the decision. It had been Jason. It had always been Jason. But he, apparently, had other plans.

"Your knight in shining armour has arrived!" Jason sang, bursting through my bedroom door and making me jump. "And he brings pizza!"

He held up the box triumphantly, diving onto my bed. I watched him in the mirror. Watched myself, too. Noticed that I looked angry, which was strange, because I didn't feel angry. I felt sad.

"Come on, Babe, eat some before it gets cold... I can't promise I'll save you any slices," he carried on casually, not looking at me. "Vegetarian Supreme! Admittedly, not as good as pepperoni but I know it's your favourite. I was thinking we could watch a movie. One of your Dad's old ones, maybe? Pipes, come here, what're you doing? Piper? Hello? Did you get a haircut? Piper-"

"-I know you cheated on me," I blurted out, unable to listen to another word. Jason dropped his slice of pizza onto my bed in shock.

"What?" He asked quietly.

"I know about the kiss."

His mouth was hanging open. "With Gwen?"

I felt like throwing up. "No, with Reyna. There was more than just Reyna?"