Playing with Fire

Chapter 18 - Complicated feelings

Charlotte's POV

As soon as Nathan walked in, I rushed towards him and hugged him tightly as my eyes welled up. He hugged me back and stroked my hair gently. I sensed he was tense.

A few minutes later, he pulled back slightly and cupped my cheek. "I bought the pregnancy test." He extended the pharmacy bag towards me.

I took it with my shaking hand and nibbled my lower lip. I took a deep breath, pulling out the test, and looked at it while my heart was pounding like crazy.

When I wanted to go to the bathroom, he grabbed my wrist, stopping me.

"Lottie, are you fine? You are trembling." Nathan asked, concerned and stroked my cheek affectionately.

"I am...afraid. I know you don't want it." I mumbled as tears ran down my cheeks.

Nathan sighed sadly and cupped my cheeks, looking into my eyes as he closed the distance between us.

"Yes, I can't say I am ready, but your thoughts are more important." He stated softly, caressing my cheeks tenderly, and smiled slightly. "Whatever the result will be, I will be beside you. You can count on me. I will not run away from my responsibilities, Lottie. And if you are pregnant, I will support you in every decision." He said honestly, looking me in the eyes.

I smiled, relieved and hugged him tightly, sobbing. He hugged me back and placed a soft kiss on my hair. Then I went to the bathroom.

I ruffled my hair, looking at the stick. I didn't know how to feel: relieved or sad. My mind was confused.

Once I threw the stick into the dustbin, I went to the living room, lost in my thoughts.

Nathan was sitting on the couch, holding his head between his hands while looking down absently. When he heard my footsteps, he lifted up his head and stood up quickly.

I bit my lower lip nervously, playing with my fingers. He approached me in quick steps and gave me a questioning look. He looked so nervous.

"I am not pregnant." I informed after taking a deep breath.

"Oh..." He breathed deeply, relieved and ran his hand through his hair, looking happy.

My expression changed instantly. Yes, I knew he wasn't planning to be a parent soon, but his behavior made me sad.

As soon as Nathan noticed that he offended me, he gave me an apologetic look.

"Lottie, I am sorry. I just..."

"You don't want it." I cut him off.

"Let's say it wasn't in my near future plans, and the news caught me off guard. But I was sincere when I told you that I would be beside you whatever happens." He confessed honestly, cupping my cheek.

"Don't worry. I am not ready for it either." I mumbled and heaved a loud sigh. However, deep in my heart, I felt disappointed that it wasn't positive. I knew it would complicate everything and it would be early, but...

"Then why did you feel bad?" He asked, concerned.

"I don't know." I shrugged my shoulders and folded my arms over my chest.

"Let's go to the hospital." Nathan suggested and grabbed his phone and keys from the coffee table.

"No, probably it is the flu or a stomach bug." I refused and gave him a reassuring smile.

"Lottie, we are going to the hospital. End of discussion!" He stated in a bossy tone. I sighed, nodding, and grabbed my bag.

Nathan rested his hand on my lower back and led us towards the elevator.