What we yearn for (unedited)

9 Milan

2 months later

Are you free tonight <3?

   The text message throws me for a loop. Not so much as because I don't know how to respond to it. More so because the message comes from an unsaved number.

   Clearly it has to be someone who has to be from someone I've linked up with before if they both have my work cell number I begin with and feel comfortable asking my plans so suddenly.

   But they obviously don't know me well enough to know that asking if I'm free is one of the most assured ways to either get a delayed or no response from me. It always helps if you say upfront what you have planned and ask if I want to join directly after.

   Just leaving it up in the air to ask if I'm open for anything tends to generate an automatic 'No' whether I have plans or not.

Ironically, though, I did have plans today-and was right in the middle of them.

"Do you need us to go?"

I set my phone down on my desk and swivel my chair around at the sound of her voice. "When exactly in the span of time that you've been here, did I say I wanted you guys gone, Elle?"

"I'm just making sure we're not intruding, smart ass." She shoots me a playful glare.

Even if I did want her to go, which I didn't, she's made herself at home on my L-shaped sectional sofa. They both did- she and Eli. She slipped her ugg boots off and has her legs were propped up while she cradled Eli. Hes not crying, not anymore like he was earlier-now that he was in his mother's arms. He quietly rests against Elle, with his pacifier in his mouth.

I'd learn in the past time that I've occasionally visited Elle that when Eli wasn't sleeping, even if he had his beloved pacifier in his mouth, he liked to be held. I of course wouldn't hold him, but it was amazing how quickly his cries quieted once he was in close proximity of Elle.

Actually, I kept marveling at how she fell into the maternal role. I mean I did notice the growing pile of parenting books near her book shelf whenever I decided to hang out with them after work. said books were usually filled with sticky notes and heavily highlighted pages so her concerns were always there. but the thing about now was that I think she was finding ways to channel any anxiety with dealing with parenthood. Sometimes we watched movies when I came over, and she and I would stuff ourselves with pizza while she fed Eli his appropriate foods. And she mentioned in one of her text's that she was in some type of first-time mother support group where she was making friends.

Her mood seemed lighter.

She did mention sometimes, she felt cooped up in the house. Even though Eli was still too small for the park and what not, she wanted to be out and about with him.

My lifestyle didn't actually give me the luxury of knowing any places that were baby friendly. But the closest thing I could think of? Was the studio I had that I usually did my photography work in. hence why we're here. well, that, and I had something to show her.

"Seriously though, I don't want us imposing," she nods toward my desk, in particularly my phone. I suspect since it did go off when I first got the text message. "If you got someone swinging by, I don't want to hold you up."

"Appreciate it but, you guys are fine." I tell her. "Someone is coming by for a little to look at photos I took for them, but they're not the one who texted. At least I don't think so."

"What do you mean?" her brow quirks.

"it's from an unsaved number."

My explanation makes her smile grow wider. "You don't even save your girls numbers?"