It was never effortless to love Aaron Warner. He was a difficult teenage boy who seemed to forget a lot of the time that that was what he was-a teenage boy. He'd always felt that loving or even caring for him would be impossible for all the world to...
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"DO YOU THINK she'll be okay?" I ask Isaac as we train.
Isaac sighs. It's been three days since Juliette nearly split the earth in two, and Castle got so mad at Isaac and Kenji that he almost physically hurt them. That was the moment I knew I'd never seen him so violently furious. Not even with me. So I was pretty shocked to see him freak out the way he did, especially with the boys.
Isaac shrugs. "No idea. But she better be."
I nod in agreement. Then ask, "Hey, you never told me your thoughts on what happened with her. I know Kenji's. . .but I don't know if you think she's a spy too. You don't, right?"
Isaac shakes his head. "No. As much as I think she probably needs help, and she needs to control her powers, there's no way she'd ever hurt us deliberately. I don't even think she meant to three days ago. She was just overwhelmed."
My eyebrows rise. "Woah. That was actually logical and smart."
He smiles. "I've always been smart."
At this, I smile. "Uh-huh. Even when that Lisa girl practically told you she loved you and you thought she was just being friendly? Even then, Isaac Meyer?"
He points an accusing finger at me. "You shut up. You were confused when a guy baked you a cake and you were so convinced that he was just trying to show you how one really bakes. Mar, don't even shake your head—you got so mad."
"How the hell was I supposed to know that he liked me?"
"The cake said "For the prettiest girl in the world", Mara."
I stay silent for a beat. "Okay? Whatever happened to people just making sweet gestures?"
"It changes when they turn into hormonal, horny ass fifteen year olds."
"Whatever. I just hope you know, that if I ever baked you a cake, it would be 'cause we're best friends."
Isaac blinks at me in disbelief. "Mara, if you baked me anything, I would run the other fucking way."
My jaw drops.
"Really?" Isaac says. "You're gonna act all shocked?"
I glance the other way, too offended to look Isaac in the eye. "You're being unbelievable, you know that, right?"
He laughs. "Yeah, okay, can we get back to training now?"
Rolling my eyes, I meet his again. "Fine." And I let the plant behind him set on fire.
Isaac shrieks, stumbling towards me in fright. I laugh this time. It's too easy to scare him.
"Jesus Christ, woman," he says, eyes wide as he glances between the burning plant and I. "You're psychotic."
I drop my shoulders with a huff. "You're way too impolite today, I don't like it."
"Sorry, mother."
I wave my hand in a single motion and the plant is doused in water, the flames vanishing. "There you go. No reason to be so scared now."
"Fuck you."
"Manners, sweetheart, don't forget them."
——————————
"Hey!" I say to Adam as he walks away.
He stops in the middle of the hallway. Turns and sees me. Sighs. I smile. Approach him. "Hey, can I talk to you?"
"Mara," he says, sounding impatient. "I can't talk, okay? I don't wanna see any one of you right now."
"I'm really sorry about what happened, but I didn't know—and Juliette was just—"
"Mara, stop,"
"Please, Adam, I don't want you to be upset over something that wasn't—"
"Mara!" he yells. He's fuming.
My chest rises and falls. I don't know what to say. I've always just wanted people to accept my apologies—for them to know truly what the situation was and explain everything so that there's no bad blood.
"I get it, okay?" Adam spits. "But I really don't need your half-assed apologies right now."
I frown. "But—"
"You know," says Adam. "You're the worst one. Out of all of them. You pretend you're all innocent and shit when really—really, you're the one who slept with Warner himself."
My body locks. I don't move—I doubt that I can. "W-What?"
Adam's eyes blaze with a fire I've only ever seen my own hands produce. "Yeah—I heard your fun little conversation with Castle. And everyone on base knew the guy had had something with some chick. Just turns out that it was you."
Blood is leaving my body, I can feel it. "Adam, you don't understand—"
"No, I think I do, actually," he hisses back. He's so angry with me. Why is everyone so angry with me? "I understand perfectly what happened and what you did—you spread your legs for a fucking psycho that's murdered and tortured hundreds."
I shake my head. "No, I didn't—I didn't—"
"What? Oh, what, you're gonna feed me some bullshit lies about how you didn't know?" He steps closer, narrowing his eyes. "Really, Mara?"
My vision begins to blur and my eyes are stinging. This isn't what I meant to happen—I didn't want this. "Adam, please, don't—don't t-tell anyone—"
"Believe me, I won't," he says bitterly. "I, at least, have some dignity and respect for others. Even for people like you."
And he walks away. I don't know what I was trying to do. Why I feel the need to assure him that nothing was meant to end the way that it did. But I know this—I know that, no matter what I do, or try, or even say—my past will forever haunt me.
And people won't be able to look at me the same once they find out.
