History Must Repeat Itself

Chapter 41

          I surfaced into consciousness and I didn't know if I was grateful or not. I couldn't remember what I'd dreamed about, but I know it had paralyzed me. I couldn't force myself awake. My chest felt like there was five pounds laying on it. I took a deep breath, hoping to clear it and the fuzz on my brain.

Steve Harrington. His name overwhelmed my mind. I opened my eyes, and I was surrounded by the decor in the Harringtons' front room. The television was on, but low. I could just hear the hum of the cartoon playing. I pushed myself up into a sitting position.

I couldn't remember how I got here. A clattering alerted me to someone else in the house. Assuming it was Steve, I pushed his duvet off my body, directly from his bed, that I'd been sleeping under.

I sluggishly made my way to the kitchen. It was the only place in this house where the sound of metal clanging together could come from. I leaned to look around the cupboards before I entered. Steve stood at the counter, his profile on view. His hair was clean, some damper pieces flopping in his face. It took a second for him to notice my entrance. We stood looking at each other for a minute, before he put down the wooden spoon he held. Tugging my hands up the sleeves of what I knew was Steve's shirt, I watched him walk up to me.

"How are you feeling?" he whispered.

I shook my head. I didn't want to talk yet. I didn't get a moment of forgetting when I woke up. But also I didn't suddenly remember. I just knew. It was sewn into my brain the second I woke up. He was gone. I couldn't think his name or imagine his face. I didn't want to cry again. I felt drained from yesterday. 

Was it only yesterday?

"Okay," Steve said quietly. "You hungry? I was starting chocolate chip pancakes with cut up bananas on top. I know you like that." He reached up and tucked some hair behind my ear. There was a look of sympathy mixed with something else on his face. "I can make something else if you don't want that though."

I shook my head again. I was scared to talk. I didn't know what would happen if I did, but it almost felt like the world would shatter. Steve momentarily frowned, but turned it into a soft smile.

"Okay. You sit on the counter over there and I'll give you some bananas to cut. I'll deal with the pancake mix and chocolate chips. I know if you had that job, there'd be no chocolate chips left." Steve poked my nose and a natural smile grew across my face. It was small but it happened.

Steve sighed. "There it is. A start, at least."

I sat on the counter, cutting bananas. When Steve turned to get the bowl of cut up pieces, he glanced up at me.

"Do you want to go take a shower? I know I changed your clothes but I thought showering an unconscious woman was a bit far."

I rolled my eyes, smiling. Steve chuckled. He held out his hand and helped me hop down.

"I've left another set of clothes for you in the bathroom," Steve said. I fiddled with the cuff of Steve's shirt and nodded.

"Oh, Jess?" I stopped and looked back around the cupboards to see Steve. "Your bra and underwear are in the bathroom already. The ones you usually leave here? I figured you weren't in the mood to hunt for them."

I nodded and Steve turned back to the counter. I swallowed, looking at the floor.

"Thank you," I muttered, walking away.

        I locked the bathroom door behind me. I was grateful for Steve Harrington, but I remembered how he looked at Nancy for the past week. He'd be my friend through all this. That's just who he is. Passing the large mirror, I caught a glimpse of myself. My hair was still in braids, but the flyaway on the top of my head was a nest. I was caked in dirt. I couldn't believe Steve put me in his clothes like this. These would need to be washed a million times. Opening the laundry hamper, I dropped Steve's clothes, my sweaty bra and underwear inside. The bandage on my leg had been changed. It no longer was wrapped around my entire thigh, just a large square of gauze and tape. My nose scrunched at the tape pulling on my leg hairs. The one on my chest was redressed too.