kids • jude bellingham

ten

2.12.23

i walk into the house to see Mia and her boyfriend sat on the sofa

i was shocked to find out who it was only a few weeks ago, and even more shocked when i found out he was best friends with Jude, but it's not like it affected me or anything

"oh hi Mimi, hi Vini" i smile to the pair as i drop my bags off in my room and walk out into the kitchen to make myself some lunch

"Chloe?" i hear Vini call my name as i turn around to face him from the opposite side of the kitchen bar

"yeah?"

"you know what's going on with Jude, right?"

"no- and i don't care" i roll my eyes and go back to making my pasta

"just let me tell you"

"fine" i sigh

"so like, he's been off the squad for ages, he's seriously depressed, he's not playing to his best"

i clench my throat

i was seriously feeling bad for him

but then again i hated him for what he did

"i'm with Joao, i don't know what you want me to do"

"let's be so for real right now, your obviously fake dating him to piss of Jude" Vini says

"what?" i stutter, how'd he know

"he doesn't even live in the same city, drop it"

"okay fine, but i still hate Jude"

i hate Jude

he broke my heart twice

and i'm too scared he'll break it again

if i could get a guarantee he wouldn't break my heart again i'd get back with him in a heartbeat

the day i kissed him a few months ago was like quenching my thirst

i needed him

he was my second half

but the damage he did to me hurt

it drove me crazy

i didn't feel like myself after he left for Germany

i sobbed for days straight

then i saw him again here in Spain

i couldn't explain my happiness

then the pain came back

and the pain is too much for me to handle a third time

but deep inside i know i'll always love him

.

5.1.20

"cee" 

"wake up" i hear his soft voice as i sit up

i smile at the sight of his face, but he looked worried

and now i'm thinking about it, and i'm looking at the clock, its 6am, why's he here?

"why are you here?"

"Cee, i don't have time to explain, but get dressed, we need to go to the hospital"

as soon as i hear hospital i know exactly what its about

i nod and rush up and grab a hoodie and some trousers from my closet

i walk downstairs and realise everyone is already in the car

i get outside and get into the car, packed with Mum, Mia, Jude and Emil

i cram myself between Jude and Mia at the back and rest my head on Jude's shoulder, trying not to worry

'it can't be that bad?' i try to convince myself

.

we walk into my dad's ward and see the doctor standing outside his room

"Mrs Harris, i'm sorry to tell you this, but your husband is in critical condition, were not sure what happened, but the cancer went crazy last night. and he won't survive for much longer. you can go in and say your goodbyes, but he'll have to come off life support soon, he's suffering too much"

i feel my heart drop, as Jude places his arm round me, and i see a tear fall down my mothers face

Emil stood there, he couldn't understand, he's only 14

my mum goes in first

she comes out in tears

then Emil goes in

and then i walk in

as i walk past the curtains i see his pale face

"dad" i stutter

"c-chloe?" he mumbles

he could barely open his eyes

i begin to cry

"chloe, i love you" he smiles "don't cry"

i didn't understand why

it felt unfair, why him, there's billions of people on this planet, so why my father now?

i hold his cold hands

"call Jude" he smiles

i nod and walk out

.

Jude brings me into a hug as i sob into his chest and comforts me till i stop

"he wants you in" i weep

he silently nods as he walks towards the door

...