Playing with Fire | Yuzuru Hanyu

36. Troubled

It wasn't even that hard to find some nice things to wear once she was in that closet but Aria had probably been staring at those costumes long enough for Yuzuru to think that something was wrong.

"Aria?"

As clingy as he had been ever since she entered that house, Aria was enjoying it far more than she should. It was both funny and adorable at the same time.

Finally retrieving what she had gone for, Aria showed up in front of his eyes again, finding relief in his expression.

"Sorry, I spent a bit too long staring at your costumes."

Yuzuru gave her a bright smile.

"I forgot those were there."

"They're different from what I expected."

"Yeah?"

"They are... Shiny."

Even with his high fever, Yuzuru could only laugh at her silliness.

"I'm a performer..."

"The last time I watched skating, and I have no idea when that was, I don't remember seeing that much bling in men"

Yuzuru just shrugged his shoulders.

"I like it, my mom did my first costumes and I always enjoyed seeing them shine under the lights."

Aria admired him for being so completely out of the toxic masculinity side. It was very easy to see that he didn't care what people thought of what he wore and in the end, from what she had seen, those costumes were gorgeous.

"I hope to see you in them someday."

"I can show you, for sure. You should come and watch me skate too."

Until then, Aria was never sure whether he would enjoy that or not but she was glad to hear that he would want her to be there for his competitions too.

It was good to understand that he didn't want distance from that part of his life.

"I will gladly do that once there's an opportunity. Now do me a favor and sleep."

Yuzuru was so stubborn that he only accepted the dreaded rest once she was lying on that bed by his side, looking at him with worry on her expression.

"I'm fine." he ended up muttering as he stared at her as well.

"I'm not sure how much I believe that."

"It's just a cold."

"It's never just a cold when you have asthma."

Yuzuru nodded.

"I just hope I get better. Nationals is in less than a week."

"That is the least of your concerns. If you don't go to nationals, you don't go to nationals. Your health is more important than trying to be national champion."

"It's not about trying, I would be the national champion."

Laughing at his silly confidence, Aria kissed his cheek and laid on his shoulder when he begged her to. Cuddling against him when he looked so weak and frail felt almost counter-intuitive but she had long realized that denying the man by her side seemed almost impossible.

It didn't feel bad either. Yuzuru always made her feel good no matter what the circumstances but the sheer fact of being in his embrace made it all feel so much better than she could have anticipated.

Even for her tired body, which had been longing for rest as well, the situation was a relief.

Aria probably ended up falling asleep quicker than he did, purely from the comfort of his embrace that managed to relax her so much.

It would only down upon her later just how much they looked like a true couple in that moment but in the end, dwelling on any labels was probably not something that either of them was ready to do.

For a few hours, they rested peacefully by each other's side, only to be interrupted by restless movements underneath her.

She woke up to a shaking Yuzuru, trembling as she had never seen before. Aria ran to get a thermometer, only to find that he had a very high fever and seemed to be in a drowsy, dreamy state.

Rushing to the kitchen, it didn't take long until she found a clean cloth and a bowl where she placed cold water.

In just a few moments, she was applying the wet cloth to his forehead in an attempt to bring down his fever.

Aria knew, better than anyone, that this man should probably be seen by a doctor given his condition but she also knew how stubborn he could be. If Yuzuru said that he didn't want a doctor, he wouldn't suddenly change his point of view.

Hours passed as she watched him in that sickly state, more scared than anything else.

Until that day, she had always seen this man as some kind of invincible beast but it was becoming quite clear that there was very little that she could do when he faced the struggles of his health. He wasn't as immune as it seemed and she was gradually understanding that he was probably the opposite.

Being an athlete with asthma was no easy feat and as little as she understood about the damned sport he did, Aria never took it as something easy. The struggles and challenges he endured through the years were only imaginable.

Watching him in such a frail state was for sure eye-opening but right at the same time, it made her realize just how much she cared for him.

Given their situation and the circumstances of how they met, it was very hard to see their relationship, if you could even call it that, as something possible.

She had always thought to be unworthy of such a man and as she got to know him better and better, maybe those worries had even increased. With each conversation, she realized how seemingly perfect he seemed to be. Polite, handsome, respectful... but most of all, he was nice. It had been clear from how he dealt with their contract before but the reality was that when you spent so much time being judged by what you did, anytime a person came with a different way of seeing things made her instantly attached.

And by now she was probably in way too deep to escape.