Never Knew

Chapter 29 - Secrets & Flights

Evelyn's POV 

The words wanted to rush out of me, I wanted to confess in detail everything my body, mind, and heart were telling me when I was around him. I had just remembered Jax's letter had been left in my drawer back at home. 

Tell me how you feel. 

I was now standing in between his legs, his chocolate-brown eyes looking up at me. It felt wrong, this moment itself felt like it shouldn't be happening between us like we were betraying the same person. His hand snuck up the back of my leg, making me take a sharp breath. 

"What're you worried about?" He whispers still eyeing me, still touching the back of my leg. I looked down at him, he observed my parted lips. 

"I fear we'd complicate everything. I'm scared people will judge me for wanting you because you're Ashton's best friend. I'm terrified of giving in to what I feel because I don't want to fall in love with you." I said, feeling a lump in my throat. 

His hand wrapped tighter around the back of my leg and gently pulled me closer as I spoke. Our bodies are not far from one another, not far at all. An urgent tingle below my stomach and the goosebumps on my flesh reminded me of how naked I was, metaphorically speaking. Jax closes the space between us and sits up straight, I grab his shoulders to balance myself. 

"You'd be my favorite secret," He whispers, I look at his rosy lips like they just said the most soul-crushing poem. 

He puts both of his hands on my hips, and I bite down on my lip, my heart beating out of this world. A petrified emotion in the back of my mind but as I buried it down all I felt were the desires he was instilling in me. 

"Jax," I whispered, unsure. What he had just said was an offer. 

We won't kiss and tell.

"It's no one's business but ours." He said, pressing his thumb above my hip bone causing me to gasp softly. 

I couldn't hold back the urgency I felt in my bones anymore. My lips struck his, and we breathed heavily as I fell on top of his body. His firm, calloused hands ran up my thighs as I straddled him. His tongue softly pushed against my lips; I invited him in as my own tongue explored his mouth. He was starving. But so was I. 

I pulled away for a moment to peek down at him, his fingertips digging into the spot above my knees. His eyes were dark and lustful but held a soft grace within them. He licked his lips as his chest rose and fell. It hurt to stop but I needed to know what it was we were agreeing on.

"What are we doing Jax?" I asked. 

"Each other." He smirked. I scoffed, rolling my eyes but then he sat up so that his eyes were leveled with mine. Jax grabbed the side of my face and sucked on my bottom lip lightly. 

"I don't want you to be a secret and frankly I don't want to be yours. But if you're that worried about what everyone else will think, then I would gladly hide you away in the depths of my heart for as long as it takes until you want to scream it out to the world." He proclaimed. 

It felt as if my heart would stop right then and there.

"We can't act like this around other people; you know that right?" I ask him, frowning a little as I try reading the lovesick sentiment in his eyes. 

"I'm very well aware of the definition of the word 'secret' you know." He half smiles. 

He places a hand at the nape of my neck, and I grab a fistful of his wavy hair as we push against each other. He bites my bottom lip, and a soft moan comes out of me. I run my fingers along his bare chest and then lower my head to place soft, wet kisses on it. I could practically hear him holding his breath. Our lips meet once more intertwining, and I pull away.