Forgotten

Chapter 9

Chapter 9 Back to Jessa

OH MY GOD, I going to live beside Nate, was the second thing that crossed my mind.

The first thing however, was how damn sexy he looked in that baby blue shirt that matched his eyes. 

For god knows how long, we just stood there and stared at each other, both afraid to look away in case the other disappears. 

It was only when I was knocked off my feet that we came back. A brown ball of hair hurled into the back of my legs before I had a chance to prepare myself. It wasn’t much of a surprise when I fell forward. That would have hurt if Nate didn’t catch me. 

I glanced down to see a very messy Rosa-Lynn looking up at me with her large blue eyes, “Hi Ms. Tate!” she said with a big grin.

I chuckled, “Hi sweetie! Look at you,” I said looking her over, “you’re a mess!”

Nate cleared his throat, “Lynn, I thought I told you to go to the bathroom. You’ve got to shower, and I told you I would be there in a minute,” he told her embarrassed and blushing .

“But daddy, I was! Yous was taking too long,” she whined.

“Oh hell-o,” Nate said changing the word last second to refrain from cussing in front of his daughter, “just let me put this inside baby girl. You go up, I’ll be right there.” Nate smiled at her.

Seeing Nate like this with his daughter reminded me of that old Nate, the Nate that I loved. It reminded me of the Nate that loved and cared for me. This Nate reminded me of my Nate, and it was terrifying. 

 “Ms. Tate, can you give me a bath!” I vaguely heard Rosa-Lynn ask me excitedly. I couldn’t find it in me to say no to her big innocent eyes that peered up at me, so I nodded.

She smiled, “Yay! Let’s go! I’ll show you my room and wes going to use the princess towel…” she blabbered eagerly. She tried pulling me to my feet, using her chubby little hands and barely there strength.

Nate grabbed my arm and pulled me up, but didn’t let go, “you don’t have to do this. It is okay, I can shower her. She won’t mind," he told me shyly. 

“No,” I smiled, “if she wants me, then I’ll go. Don’t worry, I know what to do, I’ve got nieces and a nephew.” 

"Oh right, how are Brad and Lisa? I didn't ever really talk to him, I was too scared to think what he would do to me if I tried, and you know, after what I did to you I…" Nate trailed off slowly, his first excited voice not very excited anymore.

I didn't really know how to respond, especially after seeing his face. Thank whatever god up there though for saving me the effort.

“Come on, Ms. Tate,” Rosa-Lynn screamed from her house door.

“Coming!” I screamed, “I’m coming,” I muttered with a smile on my face.

She quickly grabbed my hand as soon as I got to the door and tugged me along up the stairs.

I was shocked to put it lightly when I saw her room. It was so similar to what my room used to look like up until right before high school. With the purple walls and white furniture. The only difference was, where I had cars and sports pictures on my walls, she had princesses and castles.

Rosa-Lynn pulled me to her closet, grabbed her Pj's and her towel before showing me the bathroom.

It was only when Rosa-Lynn was dressed in her PJ’s that Nate made another appearance. 

“…and this is Mr. Snuggles!” she was telling me holding up a little brown teddy bear, “Say hi to Jessa Mr. Snuggles,” she said waving around the bears arm. We had made a deal during her bath. She said I would have to call her Rose and she would call me Jessa.

“Hi Mr. Snuggles!” I said enthusiastically, making her giggle.

“Oh and Daddy gived me this,” she said holding a very familiar object in her hand, “he said I coulds never lose it and have to keep it safe.”

My breath caught in my thought, for in her tiny hands, she was holding a little stuffed red dog, which I had won for Nate after trying so hard at an amusement park game when I was 7. He kept it!

“Of course I did,” said a voice startling me, “I wouldn’t trade it for the world,” Nate continued in a soft voice. “I’ve kept everything you’ve ever given to me. The only thing I lost is you.”

His words were piercing my heart and pulling at the walls I had pulled up around it. I couldn’t take it anymore. 

I pushed past him, running out of the house. I ignored his voice calling out to me. Running into my room, I slammed my door shut and locked it. I didn’t cry, I didn’t talk, I didn’t think, I just sat there with my back against the door, until I was called for dinner. 

I walked cautiously to the breakfast bar where we normally eat, afraid of what she was going to ask. I tried being really quiet, prolonging the questions for as long as I could. I just didn't know what to tell her. I watched as she turned around studying my face like I was studying hers. 

"So…" she started.

"So…" I responded back trying to sound nonchalant and probably failing.

"You want cheese on your pasta or not?" she asked.

I forgot why I love Lisa so much. She knew when not to ask questions. 

And so, your conversation started and soon enough we both forgot about my emotionally weak moment, or well, moments.

The rest of the week passed with no major encounters with Nate, but I couldn't tell if I was happy about that or not? 

Maybe I wasn't as 'over him' as I thought I was.

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-grey