Forgotten

chapter 4

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heyy guys,

so this is the next chapter

um, not much to say actually

yeah, so enjoy

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Chapter 4

(Present) Back to July 2006

My first year at my depressing college was, well just that; depressing. Or maybe it’s just me who’s depressed. I had told myself to get over him. I guess it’s true when they say ‘easier said than done’.

College was different from high school in as many ways as it was the same. I was almost an outcast here. I was named the Cutter, Emo, Loser, etc. even though I don’t cut. It should bother me, but I really didn’t notice it much. I ignored everyone, focusing only on my daily routine; wake up, eat, go to class, do my work, force myself to eat again, try to sleep, and repeat. My whole year passed like that.

It was summer again, when I came back home. I only came without a choice. I tried my best to make excuses for the past year not to come, not that I needed to make many. And that I am thankful for because I’m not very good at lying.  

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love coming home. I can only come home to my dad. My mom died when I was born and my brother, Brad is married and lives in New York. I love my dad and I love that, even though it was my fault, he doesn’t blame me for my mom’s death, neither does my brother. My daddy loves me too. 

So it’s not that I didn’t want to come home, and it’s not that he doesn’t want me home. It’s just that he was barely home himself, not that I blame him. Plus, there were too many bad memories for me in my hometown.

My dad had to travel a lot for work to be able to pay for my education and my brother’s before me. He wouldn’t even let me get myself a job to support myself, even though Brad had one. Apparently, that was because one day I would, and I quote, “leave and never think of daddy again”. So he wanted to do everything he could for me before that day.

I missed my dad a lot. So this summer, I decide to come home, to make up for missing Christmas and New Years with my dad.

A card greeted me at home. My dad is supposed to come back in two weeks and spend the whole summer with me here. The card was a wedding invitation.

Nate Frey weds Kyra Hale

My green eyes blurred at the sight of the card in my hand. I loved him. 

I wiped the tears out of my eyes. I would not cry. I would move on. I would change myself.

I would go back to college, I would get my dream job as a teacher, I would get a job far from here, and I would move there, and never come back.

I spend my summer with my dad, Brad and Lisa, since dad had invited them. 

With the help of Lisa, I change myself. I get rid of a lot of my tomboy clothes, and buy myself a lot more skirts and dresses. I cut my hair properly, and learn to style it from her. She teaches me the basics of make-up. I get rid of my glasses, and put on contacts instead. I completely get rid of Tate, and become Jessalynn.

I decided to break my promise, just once. I show up before the wedding for 5 minutes and don’t even bother to go to the bride’s room to wish her luck. Instead, I walk to the groom’s room. I am pleasantly surprised when I see his jaw drop when he catches sight of the new me. I smile and wish him luck, “I hope your happy Nate. Good luck and I still love you.” Before he could say a word, I turn and run out. I could hear him calling, but that just makes me move faster.

The tears come again, but wiped them away. Seeing him again brought back old unwanted memories: Our school dances, where I got to go as his date, our emergency ice-cream getaways, and our pillow fights, him climbing into my room when I felt sad, and so many more.

I shake my head to get him out. I will move on. I have to move on. I am over Nate Frey. 

I think…