Aftertaste // shawn mendes

chapter fifteen

Shawn 

It isn't a shock when I say I'm incredibly shy. I've barely ever been able to talk to new people without wanting to break down and cry. People found it absolutely alien-like to see me and Brianna act they way we did with our whole plan. As intended. 

First grade. I fell in love. I sat on a swing, not moving but just looking down at my velcro shoes. I didn't have any friends considering I never talked to anyone. A second later a tiny voice filled my ears, and at seven years old I was convinced it was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard.  

"You know it's much more fun when you're actually swinging?" 

I looked up at the pig-tail clad girl beside me and smiled shyly. What was I supposed to say to that?

The girl stated kicking her legs back and forth, trying her best to make the swing go to her desired height. " See? Like this! Fun!" 

I giggled and started kicking my feet lasily, but she was not having it. " You need to do more than that! Kick your feet, c'mon!" 

Soon we were both giggling and swinging high on the set and we did this for the entire recess. I was sure when I grew up, I would get to call Brianna Solis mine.

And now she finally was. I can't even describe how happy I was when Bee reassured me that I wasn't the only one actually playing the role of a boyfriend or girlfriend in her case.

So there I stood, waiting as the florist put together another bouquet  of Brianna's favorite flowers. Though at school it would not be different, me and Brianna were actually a  real couple now. 

I rushed off to school just in time to catch her before class. I had a slight jump in my walk with a huge grin on my face. I get to see my girl. 

When I actually got to her locker...I found something I never thought I'd ever see again. 

My "girl" was there. But I guess the my part didn't exist. Brianna stood pressed against her locker,  arms wrapped around the one and only Carson Rivers as they both kissed so desperately you could have mistaked them for trying to eat each other. 

"What?" 

My voice let out the sound in a cracked form. It was barely audible but Brianna heard it. They both broke away and she smiled awkwardly. 

" Oh, hey Shawn. Who are those flowers for?" 

I couldn't say a word. My heart was beating so hard in my ears and I was sure I was about to pass out. There was no way this was happening.

" Is this weird? Yeah, this is. Okay. Uhm, so I guess our plan is done ha. I told Carson and Penny everything and they're relatively fine with it." she says, fixing the hair Carson messed up.

"But, what about last night?" I whispered.

Brianna widens her eyes and chuckles a bit, " Did we talk last night? I was drunk off my ass so I can't really remember clearly," 

She was drunk.

She was drunk. 

I told her I loved her...

And she was drunk. 

" I told you I loved you, Bee." 

Brianna's eyes went from wide and awkward to surprised and sad. 

" Well that's kinda weird. Our relationship was fake, remember? That's all it ever was and all it will ever be." 

I nodded slowly. My legs carried me away from the scene as tears I didn't control streamed down my face. How could I have been so stupid? All the secrets, laughs we shared. Fake. That I love you. Empty. 

I definitely was left with an aftertaste in my mouth, and it wasn't good. 

Brianna Solis. I thought she was different. I truly believed she'd be the one that wouldn't take advantage of me. But I was wrong. She was just like the rest of them. 

+++

And that's it. HA IM DONE. I cannot thank you all enough for this amazing journey of writing this book. I know this is an insanely sad ending to the book, but I've had this planned since pretty much the beginning of this book. It took me more than a year to finish this and I'm so sorry for my terrible updating schedule. I hope you all enjoyed this book just as much as I did writing it. I love you all. x.

-K. 

Edit: heeeeyyyy.

So here's me like one year later completely apologizing for this shitty ending lololol. Like it was so abrupt I'm so sorry. Maaaaybe one day I'll edit this book so it's a better transition in but I've had writers block pretty much since I finished this book so yeah... Peace Out Girl Scout x.