The Reason Andy Sixx Is So DEVILISHLY Handsome.

Chapter nineteen.

Hey guys, I'm working on a trailer. Would you watch the trailer if I posted it on here? 

The surroundings around me weren't pleasant. I had no idea why I came round the back of the cafe that Ashley took me to. But at least i'm alone now. Well, we're alone.

I could hear Andy's footsteps coming around the corner and I turned the other way. I still hadn't looked at him, I couldn't bring myself to do it. How am I supposed to face him now? What will he say? I must still be in shock. My head was spinning, my vision was blurry, and to tell you the truth, I could pass out right now. I reluctantly leaned my shoulder on the dirty brick wall to steady myself, contemplating on how I'm going to destroy this yellow t-shirt after this madness has ended. 

The footstepts came to a halt and I knew he was standing behind me. No, I could feel him standing behind me. I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head, but I couldn't turn around. I just couldn't make myself do it. But then his deep voice spoke.

"Could you at least face me when I talk to you?" I tried to physically stop shaking. My leg was twitching to turn, my mind reeling on what I was going to say when I see those sapphires staring at me.  Slowly, as slow as I could make it, I turned -head faced the ground - towards him, until I saw his leather boots. At this point, I'm glad I have a long fringe.

"Look," he sighed. "I know why you're mad at me. Trust me, I'm mad at me too." He paused and just when I was about to speak he interrupted. "Can you please look at me?" His voice was stern. I slowly, up his jean covered legs, his T-shirt covered torso. He cut his hair. A smile played on his lips for a second, then it slowly wilted, seeing the smudged makeup around my eyes. Crap! 

"Have you been crying?" His voice was soft now. soothing. He held his hand out and steped forward, but at the same time, I took a step back. He stoped for a minute, sighed, and went back to the original position he was in.

"That doesn't matter. What did you want to say?" I had to be stern. I cant back down to those eyes and that voice, no matter what. 

"I wanted to say, that I'm sorry."

"That's it?"

"What am I supposed to say?"

"Andy. I haven't seen you in months. I get it, I did something wrong. You hate me. You ran off and I never saw you. Nothing. Do you know how hard it was, to see Robyn talking with Ashley non- stop, all the time, which made me think about you? About the last time I saw you?" I could feel the tears. The lump in the back of my throat. While he just stands there, staring at me.

"Shannan I-"

"No. Do you know what happened to me after that? I cried. I just cried for weeks. Thinking about what I did, what you did, why you did it. Questions. So many questions like 'what have I done?' and endless thoughts about hating you. Hating you for making me like that." Here they come. My knees were shaking, about to cave in. The world spun. 

"Shannan please. I don't-"

"Don't. If I don't say this now, I never will." My voice started to quiver, and just as if on queue, I felt the warm drops cascade down my cheeks in a never ending water fall. All the dispare and sadness wracked my body. My bones were shaking with emotion, emotion I couldn't stop. "I'd never felt like this before. All this pent up stress and anger and some other feeling my fucked up brain couldn't handle. All I could think about was you. How you hated me, how you made me feel the way you made me feel. It was like nothing I'd ever felt before. You just make everything so amplified." 

I stopped, not trusting my voice to carry on, but I knew I had too. I needed to say just one more thing. Something I don't know. Something I'm not sure how to put into words. I needed to finish this now before these wrenching sobs and deep emotion took over me. "I..I didn't know what to think. You hated me. I hate me. I..I....I just....."

I could see Andy's hand curling into a fist. I closed my eyes as I see him step closer, I needed to brace myself for what was coming. After a second I daringly looked up at him. Into those eyes that now held so much emotion, staring right back at me. He drew his hand up and cupped my face, my heart almost stopping  as that familiar energy ran through my body by his touch. I closed my eyes and leaned into his hand, savouring his touch. This was rare.

My breathing hitched, but not from the tears. It was the feel of Andy's lips on mine, and the cold sensation of his lip ring against my skin. My knees finally buckled, from what, I dont know, but his strong arms caught me as my vision faded to black and everything went silent.