Chapter 10

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"What are you doing here Peter? Who let you in?" I asked pulling the tall tan boy in my room.

"Your mom did. And I am here to take you on a date before school starts up again. We are seniors!" Peter seemed excited while he spoke. He always loved school maybe that was because he had so many friends.

I simply nodded and got changed, in front of him. It wasn't that bad. I sighed softly looking at him, I was wearing black jeans, black converse and his hoodie I stole from him. It still smelled like him and sometimes I would sleep with it, when I missed him the most. He smiled at my plan outfit stepping closer.

"Did I ever tell you how amazing you look in my hoodie?" He said through a beautiful smile that I loved more than life itself.

Wow what a great lie. Right in your eyes, nothing but lies he tells you.

I sighed at the thoughts in my head and gave Peter a soft thank you for the compliment. Even if I didn't believe it. He held my hand guiding me the his car.

After the accident with my father and the stairs the voice has been more noticeable? I heard him more. And today I didn't want him here.

Peter opens the door for me giving me a smile. He is such a gentleman, opening doors for me, ordering for me because I get nervous, anything really. I love that about Peter. I hope this date isn't fancy...

Oh if it was fancy you would be under dressed huh? Wouldn't matter, you would still be ugly. You still think he loves you? Don't hope too much, you thought your parents loved you and your father and mother want you dead. We should move the plan up.

I shook my head at the voice, god not today. Peter was talking and I wasn't paying attention because of that voice, my stomach starts to turn slowly like I am going to be sick.

"Peter...I am sorry.. I wasn't paying attention before what did you say..?" I ask softly like I was scared, but I really wasn't. I didn't know what to do, my stomach hurt more than anything I felt bad.

Peter looked over to me flashing a smile, "No worries babe. You doing okay?" He asked his smile fading.

Oh no, his smile, he is upset with me. Oh god.. not now.. I started panicking in the passenger seat as Peter was driving. I guess he heard it, he drove a little faster to where he was taking me for this date that I had already ruined.

Once we got there he rushed to my side of the car and pulled me in a hug. I am the one who upset him why is he being so kind? I hate this, I hate my head, I hate myself, and I hate upsetting him. I started crying during my panic, as he spoke softly to me.

"Oh baby it's okay, shhh I am here. Don't worry a bit." He said sweetly pulling away from the hug to meet my eyes with his own, "Now let's go eat some food and then go see a movie how does that sound?"

That's what we did, we ate, went and saw a movie. And when he dropped me off at home giving me a hug and a kiss goodbye. I got to my room without hearing anything from my parents and sat on my chair at my desk. I give a soft sigh as the voice kicks in.

What a lovely day. Wasn't it? How many lies did you count during each compliment. There were so many. How about we speed this process up and die now? How do you say?

'No gosh! What the hell man! We already have a plan we can't ditch it now who do you think I am?' I thought to myself trying to talk to the voice. I never named him, I was too scared to, because if I named him I would get attached to him.

Someone who wants to die? I am trying to help you end this terrible life before your father does it for you. And you want to start school and wait for the bullies to help that process? You're crazy.

He was right, I wanted that pain in school, it starts tomorrow. Summer went by so fast. 'I need sleep. We have school.'

There you go again saying we. But if you want to sleep okay. Let's sleep and dream. Wait we don't dream do we, we get nightmares.

'Don't try and scared out of sleeping..' I sigh and get into the bed closing my eyes.

———

A darkness invaded me, then a smell, it was similar to the hoodie I sleep with that smells like Peter. I loved that smell.

"Chris... I don't know how to say this but, I don't love you. It was a dare that got too far."

I don't see him. I just hear him, I can smell that scent. What is going on?

"We can...talk but we aren't friends, we aren't boyfriends. You're pathetic. Always crying, cutting, whining, and so annoying."

Annoying, I got that a lot growing up. People left and I got used to it. But this voice... Peter's voice, saying these things to me. I don't like it.

"Just die."

No, this isn't like him, he isn't like this. He wouldn't say this.

I woke up that morning, feeling sick, my stomach in knots. I look around to my alarm going off. When I shut it off I get ready and see a text.

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