15. Aftermath

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You left the guys behind, after your loss against Alec, but you couldn't completely leave just yet. You walked to the left side of the door and sat down on the floor, next to its frame. You wanted to go to your room and just hide for a bit. You definitely weren't fine. But you felt like a damn good actress. You weren't sure how you were able to hide how hurt you were in reality. But you seemed to have done just fine, because Jace didn't suspect a thing. Or so you thought until you heard Jace's voice coming out of the training room. "You know you hurt her, right?" Jace said to Alec almost whispering. But you heard it just fine.

"Why? I didn't hit her that hard." He replied in confusion and you wanted to facepalm yourself. Was he really that dumb when it came to people?

"You idiot." Jace scolded him. "I meant her feelings. She really does like you and even if she shows it in a weird way, she just wanted your attention."

"Jace, I don't have time for things like girls and love and relationships

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"Jace, I don't have time for things like girls and love and relationships. They are such a waste of energy." He explained, frustration clearly showing in his voice.

"I am the most powerful, when I know that Clary is with me. It's not a waste of energy. It's a power boost. And you should give it a try before you lose her. She will not like you forever." You were grateful for Jace's words, but you knew Alec too well. They were empty words for him.

"Well, then she will move on and she will be happy with someone who can give her the attention she needs." You could hear Alec's voice as if it was coming from farther and farther. It wasn't because you have moved or because he has changed place, simply it was hurting so much, that you rather started closing them out.

"No, she doesn't need it. She deserves it. You are just blind to see it." He sighed. "But I know one thing. I know you very well. There's a reason why you are my parabatai. And you will realise what you have lost. And when that time comes, I will be next to you, you will be able to rely on me, but you will be hurting damn bad." You gently smiled at Jace's words and decided to just leave them be. You eavesdropped enough and as bad as you were feeling at that moment, Jace made you feel slightly better even without him knowing. 

As you arrived to your room, you closed it behind yourself as soon as you could. You slid down the frame and started thinking. You weren't really sure what to do or what to say anymore. You got used to teasing him so much, that it became a daily task. Now that you have promised him not to do it anymore, it just felt strange. It was kind of like a connection between the two of you and by stopping, you felt like losing a part of you. Which felt strange. 

You decided to take a shower and cool yourself down. You let the water run while throwing your cloths in the laundry basket. You put some scented bath-bombs into the water and sat inside it. It smelled like you were in a field, covered in all kinds of flowers. It made you relax and that is just what you needed. You wanted to enjoy more of your self-healing, but someone thought otherwise. Loud knocking sound was coming from your bathroom door, which made you feel a bit uneasy. You didn't feel comfortable being in your Eve-costume while another person was standing on the other side of the door. You never even walked around naked in your room, even if the door was locked.

"Yes?" You tried to get information on your invader. 

"When are you coming out?" Your heard your parabatai's voice. 

"Seriously, you should just move into my room. You are coming and going like it's yours." You chuckled. You didn't see it, but you knew she was rolling her eyes. Which made you remember Alec. You shook your head and tried to get rid of the unwanted thoughts. 

"Very funny, Y/N. Now, please. When are you coming out?" You could hear her feet thumping on the floor, annoyed. 

"Give me 5 minutes and I am all ready for your service." You laughed out loud.

"I'm counting." She said strictly, but you knew she was smiling.

When you got out of the water, you realised your hands were already wrinkled even though you haven't even been in the water for that long. Or so you thought. When you looked at the watch on your phone's screen, you realised how late it was already. You took your purple towel off the rail and started drying yourself off. You didn't bother dressing up, it was only Iz after all. You just put on your black silk bathrobe and entered your bedroom. 

"How may I help, your majesty?" You chuckled, but she just rolled her eyes in response, while trying to hide the smile creeping up on her lips.

"I heard what happened." She sat down on the chair next to your table. You very well knew what she meant. "Jace told me everything." You didn't respond or react in any way. "Alec is so stupid." She said and this time you laughed. You didn't laugh out of happiness. You laughed because you found the situation comical. 

"I am fine Iz. I will get over it. It's not like I haven't had worst things in my life." You replied but you were indeed in a bad place. 

"And you expect me to believe that, how exactly?" She asked raising an eyebrow suspiciously

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"And you expect me to believe that, how exactly?" She asked raising an eyebrow suspiciously. "Don't forget that I am your parabatai. Sometimes, in some cases, I know you better than you know yourself." She was so right. You knew yourself, but sometimes you had the feeling she knew what you wanted to say or do before it even formed in you head as a thought.  

"Can't argue with that." You replied simply.

"So how do you expect me to believe that you are fine?" She questioned you.

"Okay, to be completely honest with you, I do feel down. But my life doesn't revolve around Alec and my feelings. There are more important things out there. Yes, I might feel like a bulldozer ran over me, but I will be fine, eventually. I don't really have a choice." You explained and this time she believed you. She knew when you were being truthful. 

"Just let me know if it's too hard. I don't want to see you upset." She sighed. You walked over to her and gave her a hug. It was very rare from you to show affection, but this time it just felt right. She happily returned the hug and comfortingly started patting your back. 

"Thank you." You said gratefully. 

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