Struck

18th Strike

//Misaki

I can only recall vague memories from my childhood but I know that like most girls, I wanted to have a really good wedding ceremony.

I guess I trashed that thought away when my dad left us. I have no time for romance... until Usui broke down my barriers and made me realize what I've been missing.

I love him but I just haven't planned far enough to see us marrying. I just thought I'd be with him for a long long time. Oh, wait. I might have planned a future with him, I have just forgotten that wedding part.

"Focus!" I looked up to meet his eyes. Tora has been guiding me since yesterday and he might have feelings for me but he's such a strict teacher.

Right now, we're 4 days in on remaking me into a classy lady, whatever that means. The first 2 days were just me trying on clothes after clothes and learning basic make-up touch-ups.

"How will dancing help me get Usui back?" I almost stepped on Tora's foot but averted it causing me to lose my balance, had it not for his quick save.

He quickly let go of me after making sure I'm steady again. He must be getting tired.

"We'll need to infiltrate a wedding of one of England's most prominent clan. You'll stick out like a sore thumb if we don't refine you. And we don't want that or we won't even get close to Usui, much more, abduct him."

"But I can just not dance," I murmured, already knowing it's impossible not to dance. It's the main point of the plan.

I heard him sigh. "Ayuzawa, you need to. You're getting the hang of it."

I scowled at him, "I'm barely keeping my feet off of your feet and you're telling me I'm getting the hang of it."

"I'm just trying to cheer you up. Can we do this again? Just think of it as another lesson you need to ace."

"How? It's very different from usual school lessons I'm good at."

He held my hand and guided me to the correct form again. The suddenness of his actions made my pulse quicken but hopefully he didn't notice. This nervousness will just make me clumsier.

Once he's satisfied with our dancing form he met my eyes. "You're right, it isn't science or math or english but I'm sure you're gonna ace it once you find your own way to familiarize yourself with it just like you always do."

His expression is definitely not helping me calm down. He's serious and very gentle.

"What if I don't find it?" I ask to try to get some pressure off me.

"You have me as your teacher, I won't allow you to fail. Add that to the fact that I believe in you and that every thing you do, you do it with passion." Without even noticing it, we were moving together. He's guiding me very well. "Study tip: know the basic steps." He stepped beside me and showed me the basic steps once more. We did it a couple of times until he's satisfied.

"Additional study tip, sensei?" We meet gazes and laughed. Who would've thought I'll ever call him that. Life is very unpredictable.

He held me once more he then leaned a little close and whispered, "More basic than basic steps is trusting your partner and following his lead." With that he proceeded to lead me and he's so right. I'm so used to being the one to lead that I sometimes find it hard to let go of the reins and let someone guide me but I enjoy being a follower, especially if the leader is a good person.

"You're a good person, Igarashi." It's the truth I choose to believe. It's the truth he always denies but in times like this, it's so obviously his true colors.

He stopped dancing and I collided with him. We were quiet for some time. A time longer than normal people who have fallen down together would've stayed still. His heart is beating so loud, or is it mine?

Just as I realized I should move away he held me back. I looked up at him and saw a very painful look in his face.

"Despite all I've done, how can you still trust me?" His eyes glisten with repressed tears.

"I-I just do," I moved my face closer to him. "I believe in your goodness." We're just a centimeter away from kissing and he's still not moving. "I believe that you have given up the bad guy act in front of me and I believe that even if I throw myself at you, you'll avoid me. I trust you."

I kissed him on his cheek and stood up. He's covering his face now, a sign that he wants to be left alone for some time so I did.

My heart is beating so loud that I can't even hear anything else.

My heart breaks with guilt with the fact that I wanted him to grab me and mold our lips together.

I don't deserve him.

I don't deserve any of them.