Virus 2 - A Zombie Novel

September 1st 2014

It's been a week since I shot James, and I'm finally beginning to smile again. Only at things that don't remind me of him. Luis and Winter had been really trying to make me feel better. Joe hadn't said anything to me. Like nothing. Not one word. I didn't think that was possible until now. I think he's disgusted by me. There's no other reason. I've tried, but usually he shrugs and walks away. Recently we've had a girl join our group, Estella. Joe was introducing everyone, but stopped at me. I had to introduce myself. She's been with us for about 4 days; and I think Joe is into her. She's like a boy - except a girl. She knows everything about guns, used to be in training for the army, her favourite movie is Die Hard and she seeks thrills, like actually going after the Walkers instead of letting them come to her. Oh but she hasn't killed somebody before; so Joe actually talks to her. Currently I'm sitting gin the back of a car, Winter asleep on one shoulder and Stella (Nickname) sitting silently next to me. Joe is asleep in the front seat and Luis is driving; which technically he shouldn't be seeing as he doesn't even have his learners. We hadn't found a safe spot yet, so we just keep driving around. We sleep in the car. I haven't talked to Stella much; so I thought I'd strike up a conversation.

"So Stella, most dangerous situation you've been in?" I spoke up randomly. She had dark, wavy hair and pale skin with big brown eyes. Her lips were thin but very pink.

"Believe it or not; it was before this all happened." She smiled slightly. "My ex boyfriend had locked me in a cupboard - as you do - and kept me there for 2 days, no water or food. I thought I was going to die up until his side chick found me."

"So what did you do?" I asked.

"I punched her in the face and ran." She laughed. "Worst situation you've been in?" I could easily think. The time when I killed a man.

"I don't want to talk about it." I mumbled.

"Oh." she said. "That time you shot that guy; Jack?"

"James." I corrected her. "And I don't want to talk about it."

"You brought it up." She whispered to herself; probably intending me to her it. The car started to slow down and I looked out the window, to see we were in the middle of some town street. It had stores all done it and cars scattered everywhere.

"What are we doing?" I asked Luis.

"We have no petrol left, and I'd like to be the decider of where we break down. There are heaps of cars here and food and clothes stores. Plus a library, where we can sleep for the night." He smiled at me through the rear-view mirror. I grinned back; please we'll be sleeping somewhere other than the car. I nudge Winter with my shoulder and she sits up, her eyes open but droopy.

"We're going out." I said to her. She nodded and rubbed her eyes, half her hair teased from sleeping on it. She still looked probably twice as good as me. We waited for Stella to get out because Winter's door doesn't work. Once out I groan; my legs had cramped. I followed Luis across the street and over to the building that had Grudge Library written on top of it. He pushed on the door that opened instantly, triggering a little bell on top of it. We froze, waiting for movement. My eyes flicked over to the desk where a woman stood, watching us; except she wasn't a woman, just a very well preserved Walker. She had no blood on her and her clothes were clean.

"Can you get that Em?" Luis asked me. I nodded nervously, pulling my gun out from behind me. I hadn't shot it since James, but I need to get over it. I aimed it at her and it set her off. She started trying to climb over the desk, but I was frozen.

"Shoot her." Winter demanded. I nodded, but I didn't pull the trigger. She had gotten up onto the desk now and was about to fall off it. She hit the ground and moaned, but got herself up. I was about 5m away from her, yet I did nothing. "Just pull the trigger." Winter added. But I knew I couldn't. I lowered my gun and stepped back, indicating I couldn't do it. Of course Stella stepped forward. She walked straight up to it and plunged her knife into its forehead. I closed my eyes, not wanting to see her hit the ground. I turned and walked away, avoiding the looks from everyone. I walked to the door and closed it, sliding a bookcase in front of, blocking it off.

"Um - well; everyone gets an aisle between the book shelves and that's where you can sleep." Luis said. I nodded and followed Winter in the direction she's going. She found one in the history section and looked at me.

"You can share with me if you want." She asked. I shook my head.

"I think I need to be alone." I mumbled. She smiled, throwing her stuff on the carpeted floor. I walk between the aisles, looking at the books. I want to sleep in one that has books about travelling. Books that have pictures of other countries, before all this shit happened. I found the World Knowledge aisle and set up camp, putting my bags down and leaning against the shelf, sliding down into seating position. I don't know how I got to this. A murderer. A coward. I week ago I felt like I could do anything - but now I feel myself slowly shutting down. It's like I'm dead; but breathing. A soulless body just walking around. I'm empty, and have been for a while. I stare at the bookshelf across me, hardly thinking. My mind was blank. I didn't feel sad. I didn't feel happy, scared or confused. I felt angry. Angry at Joe. How could he not talk to me? I killed James because of him! He wanted him gone and I got rid of him, and I don't receive a thank you? Not even an are you okay? I stood, knowing exactly where I was going. He wasn't going to talk to me, so I'm going to talk to him.