Afraid | Nikki Sixx

31.

Nikki's POV

Soundcheck was going horribly for me. I was trying to pay attention to where we were in the song and messed up, yet again. "Fuck!" I exclaimed. I heard Vince sigh loudly. "Come on, man. This is the third time this happened." He said, clearly frustrated. "I'm sorry, I'm just distracted." I said, rubbing my eyes. "Yeah because you treated Carly like crap." Mick said. I groaned. "Not this shit agai–" "No, you really made that sweet girl feel like shit." Tommy spoke up. "This is between Carly and I, okay? So butt out." I said, tuning my bass.

"You know what she told me last night, Sixx?" Tommy said standing up. "She said her father fucking beats her and she's scared of running into him again when she sees her Mother but, you're too much of a fucking asshole to realize that she wanted you to come to protect her!" He yelled. I felt my face drop, my face went pale and my mouth went dry. I looked around at the other guys. They all have the same expression I do. For once in my life, I was speechless.

"Oh my god, where is she?!" Vince exclaimed, putting the mic down. I put my bass down and I felt my body go numb. "O-Oh my god," I stuttered. "She-She could be hurt!" I said, "where did she go?! Does anyone know, did she tell you Tommy?!" I asked, my voice raised. He shook his head sadly.

I walked off the stage and walked out of the venue. I looked around, I could never find her. I don't know this city, this state. I rubbed my temples and walked up to our manager. "Do you have any way to find out where Carly might have gone?" I asked him. He shook his head. "Sorry, but I'm not a magician." He said. I groaned loudly and walked back into the venue. "Sixx, you need to calm down." Mick said.

"Calm down?!" I exclaimed. "She could be hurt!" I added on. "We can't think the worst like that, she also could be fine!" Vince said. "We have to just hope she's okay, there's no way we can get to her." He said, rationally. I sighed, defeated.

I should have just gone with her, I should have just met her Mom, it's important to her and she has the risk of being met with her Father. I felt like shit, guilt washed over me. I can't believe how much of an asshole I have been to her.

"Nikki?" I was broken from my thoughts. I looked up and saw Tommy in front of me. "What's going on in that head of yours?" He asked. "I'm just realizing how much of an asshole I was to Carly." I replied. "I should have just gone with her to meet her Mother, it would have made her happy, I could have protected her if she did see her Father." I said, even with my 6'1 height, I felt so incredibly small and horrible.

"You can't beat yourself up about this, when she gets back you both can talk. She's a forgiving person." He tried to reassure me. I shrugged. "Let's just try to get through this soundcheck." I said, growing tired of having him try to comfort me. It wasn't working and nothing will make me feel better until I know that Carly is safe.

The day dragged on, it was now time for the concert and Carly still isn't back. Each minute that passes by, I grow even more worried. "Something's wrong." I said to the boys. "Maybe she just lost track of time?" Mick suggested. I shook my head. "I really don't think she'd miss our show in her home town." I said.

The all shared glances. "Maybe she's just spending time with her Mother and sister. She was really excited about seeing them, she said she'd be back in time before we leave." Tommy said.

I sighed and we all got ready to go out on stage. We walked out and the screams filled my ears, I looked at the front row and felt a pang of worry and sadness hit me when I didn't see Carly in the front row like always.

(a/n: thank you so much for reading, i hope you enjoyed! please vote, it's greatly appreciated! feedback is always welcome, okay bye👻)