Memorize (Book One)

Into Starling's Dream

I wake up exactly where I was meant to be.

The Pod has taken me there. Far away from the Red City, to the place where I longed to be.

I am there, and it is breath-taking. The sea is exactly as it was before: a dazzling blue immensity, waves crashing endlessly on the shore, wind carrying the smell of salt and sulfur.

A feeling of peace washes over me.

The coast is white. Purely white, infinitely white. Far away I can see the yellow mountains...

There is no other place like this on B24. It is the only sea on my planet. And it is so huge that you hardly ever meet people on the beach, although quite a few families and couples go there on many occasions.

I just realize that I am standing bare feet in the sand.

"Boy it feels soooo good!"

It is the perfect moment : the three suns of B24 never reach the zenith, but they are high enough to provide an ephemeral lukewarmness. High enough to shine above the sea and transcend blue and white into glaring stretches of water and fragmented feldspar.

"Woah... It's just...There are no words for this."

"Then shut up!" answers the man next to me.

I turn around and see him. He has just sat down, cross-legged, on the sand. It is a posture he often takes. And I feel my heart swell with too much love. Far more than my chest can contain, for sure. Oh, I'm going to miss him. I don't ever want to let him to go!

I look at the Restless Sea. There are very few animals on the barren lands of my planet. But I can hear a few Buddy Birds, and I love them. They make the strongest bird song ever, yet they are so small. Tiny balls of beige fur with long, flapping wings that carry them high up, to heights only flying pods can reach.

Oh I love this place so much! I'm going to hate it when he's gone. He's the only one I can turn to when I feel stupid or have questions. He's the one who never gives up on me. The one who knows me best. The one who puts up with my failures. The one who makes me feel alright.

"Dad... What happens when you are re-scheduled? Do you know?"

"You know about as much as I do, Bud. In life, one day, you reach a point where there is no return. So you have to move on. Our humanity has survived like that. Through re-engineering. It is the only way."

"But, aren't you scared?"

"I am. But I am going to leave knowing that you are fine. You have grown into a handsome young man. You are bright. You are smart. You are strong. You can fly on your own now, Buddy. You don't need me anymore."

"But dad, I do... And I don't want you to leave. I don't know how life will be without you. Gonna hate it."

"Now you have said a forbidden word, son. There is no hate in our world. We have evolved beyond that. We have defeated all the chronic ailments of our ancestors.  We have overcome sickness and old age. These are just bedtime stories now, telling us about the Old Days. There is nothing you hate. It is just fear. And it will pass. Know that I will be safe, too. And that you are my best...my best..."  Dad pauses. "I am proud of you, son. I really am."

At that moment, the Pod starts vibrating gently. I know the dream is going to end. My heartbeats are too fast. My feelings are too high. But I don't want it to end. I don't want it to disappear.

The Pod is humming now. This is the warning. The dream will pop at any moment.

I have to tell him, before he goes. I never told him. I'll never forgive myself for that. I hate myself for that.

"Dad?"

"Yeah Buddy?" He's looking at me, tiny lines on his forehead. Smiling. Quiet and strong. Yet there is something dark in his blue eyes. There is something dark beneath the awesome looks. I should have known. I should have reported him. I could have saved him.

I throw myself on him. I take him in my arms, hugging him, squeezing him. I'll never let him go. Never. I'll kill them if they want to stop me!

"Dad, I love you!"

The words are ringing in my ears and mingling with the Pod's hum. I hear Buddy Birds laughing in the distance. I hear the waves crashing. I hear the wind. I hear blood thumping in my ears. I hear my dad.

But it's too late.

My eyes are open. I am crying. I'm feeling vibrant and complete.

And I don't remember why.