When story comes alive

Part 9.

I was seated at an Italian restaurant waiting for my date to turn up. The table was booked on Jenna's mom's name. Since she worked in the hotel industry, she had booked us a table at one of the finest restaurants in the city. I was a little early, so, I whipped out my phone and got busy on it.

I was dressed in casual clothes without paying heed to Jeena's advice. She had given me a lot of instructions for the date. Since this was my first date in about a year and a half, which according to her was more than a generation in dating life. I was an outdated dater. Her last instruction, just as I walked out the door was not to argue over picking up the tab myself. I knew, I was very much capable of committing that faux pas since I believed in equality, but I looked at her innocently and she shut me down with hands on her hips and wide scary eyes.

This morning I woke up late and dragged my feet around the house until it was time to get ready for the date. I tiptoed around Jenna (until she took over giving dating advice) for the fear that she would be able to make me spill out my guts. Something had happened since I began writing my story and worse yet, something I had done in my last 2 parts which I had written the previous day (one published and one unpublished) of my story was eating me from the inside. Since I began writing, I had enjoyed recalling memories of Aiden. As the story progressed, I realised that I truly missed him and may be I had loved him too. The feeling was so exhilarating and addictive that I did not want to let go off Aiden. I did not want to end the story as it had actually ended- unceremoniously. In reality, after our constant arguments, we had called it quits. Or rather he had called it quits and I went along with the decision. We never even got to say a proper goodbye. Everything about him driving down to say something, was a product of my imagination. Some part of me did not want it to end. I would have hated to accept this in front of Jenna that I always love sweet endings and that was the reason I wanted our relationship to end on hope. I wanted Aiden to come back for me. I realised, I was a little romantic after all. But with this realisation of love, I had not set aside my practical mind. I knew Aiden could be with me only through my story so I had given our story some hope. I read through the unpublished 2nd part once before hitting "publish". Jenna did not know that Aiden driving home to get back together was fiction, but with this new part she would definitely find out that I had smoothly transited from facts to fiction.

Just as my thoughts were using all of the processors in my head, I heard an appealing voice say 'Eva?' that was when I realised I did not know my dates name! I looked up from my phone to meet his eyes.

Emma never heard from Aiden again and neither did she try to keep in touch with him. If there was anything he wanted to say, it was left unsaid.

Soon she got busy with collage life and pushed Aiden's memories into the back shelf of her mind pantry. But what really helped her forget Aiden was her new boyfriend. He was a popular guy. Emma never thought popularity existed in college until she met him. They met when he helped her find the administration office that she was looking for. The next day he had tracked her down with just her first name and asked her out. He was an extremely charming guy and Emma could not help but fall for him quickly. She did not know if it was his charm or if it was her effort to get over Aiden, but she seemed to be taking on his ways, his friends and his shirts too. Not only was he good looking but he came from a very wealthy family. He drove her home to Connecticut once and that was when Emma realised whom she was dating. There were parties she got invited to just because she was with him. Her social calendar was suddenly full. Not that she was invisible earlier, but now she was with the person who was the centre of the universe..err centre of the uni. Life was fun with him until she realised she was losing herself in the relationship. She knew more people now, than she had her entire life but she could not call a single person her good friend.  She was spending  less and less time studying  which was bothering her. She did not like the way she had changed being with him but she was fond of him. She thought that the relationship would work out eventually. And now that she knew she had changed, she could go back to being herself. She thought that if he really liked her, he wouldn't mind. So she slowly tried changing back to being a nerd. Days passed and their relationship seemed to be going well but she was wrong.

One day Emma stayed back to study and arrived late to a party. She wanted to be with her boyfriend even if it meant spending very little time with him. She tried locating him but he was nowhere to be found. Her calls were not answered  and she thought it was impossible to hear the phone ring over the loud music. She made her way through dancing bodies, in search of him. Just as she was ready to give up and turn around,  her eyes scanned the room one last time. She was in for a shock when she found him wrapped in a girls embrace, kissing her in a dim lit corner. She felt the rug pulled from under her. She did not confront him but just turned around and walked away. He spotted her leaving and immediately knew what it meant. He chased after her but their relationship was over. Emma was ready to compromise on many things to be with him but cheating was unacceptable. She took days to get over the relationship or rather the cheating. But the healing was faster when she realised if he was not interested in the real her, it was not worth it. The person she had turned into while with him, was not her. She also realised the possessiveness that she had felt for Aiden was missing in this relationship.

She dated several guys after that, but only briefly. Nothing lasted more that a couple of dates until she finished school and began working. That was where she met Andre. Andre was a little older to her and hence more responsible. He allowed her to be the kid in the relationship. This was a relaxed, laid back relationship. He was a workaholic but he made sure to take time out for her. He was not very romantic and that was perfectly fine with Emma. She never expected him to plan romantic dates or to spend every waking minute with her. They both put their demanding careers first and it worked for both of them. Everything seemed perfect but then she slowly realised that Andre was more serious about their relationship than her. She liked him and had been going out with him for a year but she had never thought about their future. She wanted to take her time and enjoy being in a loving relationship, after-all she was just out of collage and wanted to enjoy her independence for a few more years. But Andre had other plans. A year into their relationship, he asked her to move in with him and her hesitation gave him the answer that he needed. Thus their relationship ended. She did not blame him. He was a perfect husband material- simple, bland and some may say vanilla. She thought he deserved someone much better than her. She considered herself too flaky for him. She was a little layered like a "cassata", a little bit of a nerd, a little bit of adventurer, a little bit of a writer all hidden within and she wanted to explore every bit of her personality and not settle down just yet. What she felt in this relationship was comfort but not the excitement or the sparks she had felt being with Aiden.

Not that she needed Aiden all these years. Her life, after him had not been bad at all. She had found a caring boyfriend like Aiden (what the huh? I cursed myself under my breath as I deleted his name)

She had found a caring boyfriend like Aide

She had found a caring boyfriend like Aid

She had found a caring boyfriend like Ai

She had found a caring boyfriend like A

She had found a caring boyfriend like Andre,

(Although I wanted to say Andrew(Andre), the first thing that my fingers typed was Aiden. I corrected it.)

and some wonderful people like Jenna had entered her life. She did not want it any other way. She was happy and she thought she did not want to look for love. But after a non clinical, scientifically unproven, psychological experiment of writing down her story, conducted by Jenna, Emma began missing love.... Rather she missed Aiden. In every relationship she had searched him. With her collage boyfriend, she did not feel enough for him to be affected by his cheating and she realised she became a different person with him. With Aiden, they both were like reflections of each other. There was no question of changing drastically to accept each other into own life. With Andre, the attachment never grew beyond a caring relationship because she missed the ease and excitement she felt with Aiden.

Many years had passed since their relationship had ended. Emma never Cyber stalked him as she thought it was too painful. She was no longer in touch with any of her high school friends, so she was not aware of his whereabouts. In this highly networked world, she might have been the only girl to not keep tab on an ex or rather she deliberately chose to live under a rock with regard to Aiden. But one day, she was on a blind date. As she sat at a posh restaurant, waiting for her date to turn up, she hoped with all her heart that it would be Aiden.