Illusions and Lies (A Super Smash Brothers fan fiction)

CHAPTER FOUR: DOUBTS.

Warnings: Mentions of self harm. This occurs right after the small time skip to the next morning and continues until Sheik and Zelda are let out of their cell to go to breakfast. View at your own discretion. 

As a general rule, Sheik didn't try to invade Zelda's personal space. Especially when she was more prickly than usual. It was the least he could do- and besides, when she got into one of her moods, she was hard to understand anyways.

Now, though... her silence was unnerving. Especially because Zelda was usually so talkative.

"Zel?" Sheik whispered, breaking the heavy silence that had settled over the two of them. He could see that she was turned away from him at the moment, and Sheik sighed inwardly.

It was a few minutes before Zelda responded, and she sounded like she was crying.

"We watched him die." Zelda whispered back, holding back a sob. "We all watched a kid die, and we didn't do anything about it."

"I know."

Zelda rolled over to face him now. "How can you be so calm about this?" She whispered, her voice breaking as she spoke.

How could he be so calm about this? Sheik wasn't sure. Maybe it was because he'd seen worse, in his dreams.

Yes, his dreams. How many times had he watched Corrin or Zelda die in his dreams? How many times had he watched the Headmaster brutally torture his best friend to death, while Sheik watched in horror, unable to do anything to stop it?

How many times had he seen the light leave someone's eyes, as they exhaled for the last time and their body stilled, never to move again?

"You know why." Sheik mumbled.

Zelda was silent for another moment. The only sound was her faint sniffles as she tried to calm herself down. Sheik's hands were shaking, as the mere memory of what confronted him most nights was enough to turn him into a quivering mess.

"Gods, Sheik, we're both a mess." Zelda laughed, but it was a broken sound, which was a sharp contrast from her usual happy laugh.

"I'm the only one allowed to be falling apart here." Sheik attempted to joke, but it fell flat.

"You're not allowed to joke about it. You know how I feel about your jokes." Zelda scolded. 

Sheik sighed. It was true, he usually joked about his nightmares when he was feeling horrible, just to hide the pain. Smile, and nobody would think twice. Not that anybody spared him a second thought, anyways. He didn't deserve it. 

"Sorry." Sheik mumbled in response. "Zelda, at least talk to me. What's going on in that head of yours?"

It was a familiar question, of course. Usually, Sheik was on the receiving end of it. Most times, he refused to say anything beyond "I had another nightmare and it was fucking terrifying."

"I just can't get over the fact that the Headmaster and Ridley killed Pit like that." Zelda whispered. Naturally, she was more likely to talk than Sheik was, since she was a very emotional person. Well, compared to her twin, she was emotional. 

"They said he took a poison pill, rather than give up whatever information he was carrying." Sheik pointed out. 

"Same difference." Zelda said dismissively. "They still drove him to the point of taking his own life."

Her next words chilled Sheik to the bone, as they were so out of character for her.

"I'll kill them. I swear I'll kill them for what they've done. They hurt you, they hurt my friends, they murdered a little boy. Those monsters deserve to die." Zelda whispered, her voice rising in volume and intensity as she went on. 

It honestly broke his heart. Zelda wasn't supposed to be vengeful and angry. He would shoulder that burden for her. He didn't want to see her start down the same path he had. 

"Zelda..."

"They have to die." Zelda's voice shook as she spoke, and a sob escaped her lips despite her best efforts to suppress it. 

Sheik wasn't usually one for physical affection, but he felt it was probably warranted in this situation. He sat up and slid off his cot, walking across the room and kneeling next to his twin.

"Zelda, look at me." Sheik said softly, trying to sound as reassuring as he could. 

Reluctantly, she met his gaze. 

"I'm sorry. Please don't bloody your hands for me. We both know I don't really deserve it, yeah?" Sheik said, covering Zelda's hands with his. 

"You're my brother, Sheik. Of course you're worth it." Zelda replied, taking a deep breath. 

He took a moment to consider this, since he'd heard a version of that several times before. Finally, he smiled wryly and moved to sit next to her. "Zelda, there's no saving someone like me. You know that. No amount of blood is going to fix what's been broken inside me."

Zelda threw her arms around him in a hug, which took him rather off guard. "Stop it! You're not past the point of no return yet! I'll- I swear I'll find a way to fix this!"

"I don't think there's anything you can do now, Zel." Sheik whispered, hugging her back. Granted, it felt a little awkward for him, but he was trying. 

././.

Eventually, Sheik and Zelda must have fallen asleep. When he woke up, his back ached from sleeping in a sitting position. He stood up carefully, trying not to wake his twin. Surprisingly, he hadn't had any nightmares. 

Of course, as soon as he thought about that, a flash of what he usually saw at night confronted him. 

An image of Corrin's body, bloodied and broken, held in Sheik's arms as the light left the silver haired boy's red eyes. 

The sound of Zelda's scream as a whip came down against her back.

Sheik's breath caught in his throat, and he fought the urge to cry out. As it was, he stumbled over to his cot and sat down. 

"No... no, no, no..." Sheik found himself whimpering softly as the images played in his head over and over again. 

Over, and over, and over again. They never stopped once they started. 

Not unless Sheik pressed his nail to the inside of his wrist and pressed as hard as he could. The pain cleared his head, which was exactly what the Headmaster had planned when it happened. 

Only pain would break the vicious cycle Sheik found himself trapped in. 

So, almost without thinking, he did exactly what he could in that situation. After all, if he didn't have access to a blade, he'd have to make do. 

Zelda wasn't awake yet. Sheik traced lines in his skin, just to clear his head. Just so he didn't have to listen to their phantom screams that still tortured him. 

He wasn't sure how long it was until the wake-up call sounded. Well, it was more of a Caretaker banging on the doors and screaming at the Gifted to wake up. 

Everybody seemed kind of in a daze. Marth looked like he'd hardly slept at all, and Lucina was subtly clinging onto Robin's hand like a lifeline. While the Headmaster discouraged relationships, as long as it was between a boy and a girl, they didn't care.

If it was two boys, or two girls, however...

Well, it wasn't pleasant. 

And Sheik didn't want to think about the consequences.

Because he already knew them.

Samus looked dead inside, like usual. Robin was pale and doing his best to stay strong for Lucina. Ike looked tired, which was also pretty normal. Link and Roy were talking quietly, and they looked mostly unaffected.

Corrin... Well, Sheik's gaze kind of skipped over Corrin. He didn't want to think about the state of his best friend right now, because then he'd worry and then he'd feel that annoying little tug in his chest.

Goddesses above, why couldn't he just stop feeling? 

That was all he could think as he entered the meal room. 

Why did feeling have to be so hard?