Year 5, chapter 23. Drafted into the Army.

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I'm in an army, well it's more of a small militia. It's a group of students who have gone behind Professor Umbridge's back. Studying magic under my brothers command.
I think it been going well, my power is growing, but still my biggest fear is that Professor Umbridge will find out. Let's hope Pinky Posh doesn't.

I however I'm still having harrowing nightmares, and they're becoming more frequent, and the potion of dreamless sleep is not doing anything to help. I'm afraid it's only getting worse, and this fear I harbor tells me I need to figure out how to stop it.

On another note, my hands feel better, and there is no more scarring. I'm truly in Snape's debt for such a fix. I hope he realizes that I'm grateful to him, now than ever before. Well except the night that Cedric died. Snape's gentle kindness towards me that night was rare. But after that incident I felt our... whatever we are, get stronger.

I hope it continues to grow, because I feel empty without hearing Snappy-Pants velvety voice, or when he and I pitch a few good insults at each other. But there is something else, my little feelings for him grows deeper each moment I spend time with him. On his part I noticed he is more relaxed near me, and more genuine with me. For someone like him, that means the world to me.

My thoughts stop, as I hear footsteps behind me, I turned my head to look, but nothing. I quicken my pace to the Room of Requirement. Hopefully nobody has followed me. I enter, eager to start today lessons.

I realize I'm the only Slytherin in Dumbledore's army. I think that's because they all care about there imagine. I do in a way, but this whole situation goes beyond social status. Sometimes you have to taint your reputation to do some real good. But no, everyone would rather be living a lie, and be miserable about it all. I enter the room, smiling.

I greet Harry, he seems to be anxious today. I don't know why it seems like every other typical day. Well maybe except the fact it's going to be Christmas break tomorrow. I of course will be staying at Hogwarts. Ivory and Ebony have offered me to come, but I know I would feel out of place.

"Today we are doing the Petronas charm, and working a few other techniques," Harry said with confidence. It seems his anxiety has gone away. I look over at Cho, and I realize my brother been anxious because he has a thing for her. Out of the women, it had to that one.

I stand, and my wand it at the ready. "Expecto Patronum". The image of a translucent pale blue almost white, raven flies out of my wand. It soars across the room, the lands on my shoulder.
"Good job sis, most people don't get it on there first try." He smiles excitedly.
I smirk. I had a little training of this charm before." He nods then continues to check on the others.

Later Neville is standing across the room, for this reason I'm sure he is trying to preform Expelliarmus correctly. I hope he can get it, for that it will boost his confidence and spell casting.
I watch his form, he looks good in that regard. But what about his tone, I guess I will see.

"Expelliarmus." The wand on the dummy flies across the room. I'm the first to tell Neville he did an amazing job, and that he could do anything. Before the whole crowd clapped. After that Harry dismisses everyone, I stay back to talk to him. To tell him how much I truly appreciate this, and to have merry Christmas of course.

"Harry, I just want to say how thankful..." he brushes past me, and turns his head. "Not now." He spatted. He continues to walk over to Cho.
How dare he, I'm his sister. I'm certainly more important than a silly love affair. Aren't I? I mean he could have at least listen for another thirty-seconds of his precious life.

I watch Fred and George, it would seem they have suffered the same fate as well. Though I see past then, something is in the mirror, I walk a little closer.
I gasp, an image of Voldemort appears to be staring at me.
"You're just like me Rosabel."
I shake my head. "no..." I whispered. I start to run out of the room.

I keep running, like being able to breathe is no longer a concern. His voice is echoing in my head, I feel myself falling into a pit of darkness. My body is starting to feel numb as Voldemort takes hold of my thoughts, I must make it to Severus. No he will know.

"No running in the hallway." Professor Umbridge swishes her wand, sending me flying across the corridor. I land hard on the stone floor, I look to see Pinky Posh walk up the spiral staircase.
I gave her nastily look, before I felt his presence once more.

I get up on my hands and knees,
I reach out to the potions class door. "Not much further..." I grunted out. Ebony happens to be next to me.
"You need help, come on."
"No, leave me alone!" I scream, whiling holding my arms over my head. "I will not be your puppet."
I keep screaming, then my pleads turn onto whispers.

When I felt a soft hand on my back. My hands drop to my sides.
The touch of black entering in my view, confirmed it to be Snape.
"Miss Potter, 5 points from Slytherin for causing a scene."
He pulls me up to my feet, and gently but drags me into the potions room, right into his office.

He stops, putting a hand on my cheek. "Look at me." I force my head up. Even if the voices are pulling me deeper into darkness.
I can still see his black eyes filled with worry, I do love when emotion plays on his features. I felt something when I thought of him, like the evil slowly rushing out of me.

"Focus on me, just me."
His voice is stern, but sightly strained. I think he is very worried about it all. In that case I do believe he does care about me.
I feel the darkness that is clouding me fade. The whispers of the dark lord begin to dull. I look straight into his eyes, the only place I would allow myself to be pulled into the dark. Is in his black orbs of stunning mystery.

"Professor you have beautiful eyes." I watch him go from worried to taken aback. I feel dizzy, but luckily I no longer feel the sinister presence of Voldemort. I stumble a bit, but he places a hand on my waist and the other on my shoulder.

"Careful." He says quietly while removing his hands. I avert my gaze finally. Now I stare at the floor. "I don't know what happened."
He puts a finger on soft plumb lips. "I do, after the holidays I fear I will have to train you to block out his compulsions on you." I look up at him avoiding his eyes.

"Isn't that a good, you can teach me how to strengthen my mind from such horrible things."
He frowns. "It's not an easy process, secrets you wish to keep hidden will be revealed to me."
I blush, there are certainly things I wish to keep hidden from him.

"I understand, but I have to do what is necessary to keep me safe." I hope I can request, Professor McGonagall to do it instead of Snape. Or anybody that won't judge me, or tell my precious secrets. Not that he would judge me, it's more so I don't want him to know how I feel about him.
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End of year 5, chapter 23. Drafted into the army.

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