Chapter 29

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Lyla


Four hours and fifty two minutes. Let's just round it up to an even five hours. That is how long the drive is from here to Grand Rapids. Even if I managed to sweet talk my parents into getting me a car for next year, spending ten hours in a car most weekends would not be ideal. All week long I have been researching the team and town. Even going so far as to look up the other teams in their divisions, none of which are any closer of a drive.

A week has already passed since our late night divulging of future worries and plans. When we woke up in the morning, neither of us brought up the topic, steering clear of anything that was even in the same ballpark. We ignored the matter that whole day by some miracle and this week we have barely seen each other since being back into the grind of the school week.

I'm honestly still trying to wrap my head around the conversation we had and Shawn's pledge to basically give up on playing next year if I asked him not to. I was stunned by his words and didn't know how to respond. I still don't know how to respond.

Not to mention I have all the paperwork in my bag right now for applying to the summer program. Will had printed it off for me and gave it to me on Wednesday. He offered to help me out with filling them out since he had already done his, but I declined the offer and assured him I would be able to figure it out myself.

To be honest I haven't even looked at the papers. They've remained tucked in my bag since he handed them over to me two days ago. I think if I look at them it will all become too real again and until I know what is going on with Shawn and me I don't want to add more onto my plate.

I'm on my way to the cafe just off campus to meet Bailey for a coffee. I smile as I think of her and realize how much I miss her. I haven't seen her for about three weeks when we last met up for coffee to catch up. Neither of us are at fault, we both have busy schedules so even being able to meet up today was a small miracle.

Shawn is already on the team bus on his way out of town for an away game. I walk into the café and spot Bailey at a small table in the corner and she smiles and eagerly waves me over. When I reach the table she stand up and we hug each other.

"Hey girl, I miss you," she says sweetly as we both sit down at the table.

"I miss you too," I reply back as our server stops at the table and quickly takes our coffee orders.

We fall into our usual catch up conversation. Bailey tells me about her latest romance, some boy named Clint that she met at the gym on campus. According to Bailey, he has washboard abs and a face that begs to be sat on. I actually spit coffee out onto the table when she makes that comment and clumsily reach for napkins to clean up my mess and she bursts into laughter.

She tells me the latest about her roommate too and they seem to be getting along a bit better which I'm happy to hear. I always wish that everyone could get as lucky as Megan and I with their assigned roommates, but I guess we can't all win.

"I'm sure you've heard about Shawn's big news?" She asks me with an excited smile that reminds me of Shawn's last Friday.

"Yes, I have," I answer her, doing my best to sound excited for him. "Did he text you about it?"

"God no," she answers with an exaggerated eye roll. "He did a conference video call with my dad and me to tell us. I thought his head might explode with how excited he was," she explains as she laughs lightly. "I haven't seen him this excited in quite awhile," she admits.

I instantly feel sick to my stomach. Hearing again how excited he is for the offer only brings my guilt back to the forefront. He is literally offering to give all this up for me if I say the word. How am I supposed to tell him to stay with me next year when I know how much playing next year means to him?

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