It Began With a Text

Light

     Felix said on his ASMR that everyone in the world deserves a compliment and "Good on ya" is an Australian term for compliments. So, we're on chapter 77 and I'd like to say you guys are some of the most dedicated people I've ever seen for reading this far and leaving comments that make my day! Good on ya!

     It was only the electricity that had went out but to Felix, someone might as well have turned off the oxygen.

     When his friends had told him to stay put in the mall, Felix had felt a rise of uneasiness but had agreed anyways. He sat against the wall near the video game store, prepared to wait out whatever the heck was happening outside. It was only when the lights went out that it hit Felix.

     He was really alone. 

     He hated this feeling. The type where he felt his heartbeat plummet down to the absolute low, he'd forget how to breathe, not feeling any reason to even try to get air. He was stuck in a dark place where he felt he'd never get out. It had been the same way at Seungmin's house too.

     Because no matter where he was, whether he was in a bright coffee shop, or a pitch dark mall during a storm, Felix could never get out of his certainty that he was about to lose everything.

     It had happened before, what was stopping it from happening again?

     He heard sirens. Or did he? Felix had thought he had heard sirens at Seungmin's house but they had never existed. What news did these sirens bring? Who's life would they forever change? What was happening that Felix couldn't be there to witness?

     Of course, those would only be valid questions if the sirens were really there. When would Felix ever stop hearing them?

     He was stuck. He wanted out so badly, but he had no control over anything. It was suffocating.

     Trying to get the ringing out of his head, Felix put his head in his arms, letting his phone slip to the ground beside him. It pinged with one notification after another but Felix couldn't respond. The phone light turned off, along with Felix's remaining hope that there was anything but this darkness he felt all around and inside of him.

     Until he felt light again.

     It hurt his eyes and Felix didn't have the energy to check where it was coming from. Whether it was even real for that matter.

     He felt something (a hand?) on his shoulder.

     "Felix, hey, I need you to breathe," a voice rang out.

     Breathe? Was he doing that? Felix wasn't sure. "I... can't"

     "Yes, you can. Mate, I need you to calm down."

     Mate? That was when Felix finally looked up, clasping his hand to stop it from shaking.

     It was Chan, his phone light illuminating the space around them. He sighed in relief. "You never responded in the group chat and everyone got worried."

     "Chan... you're here." Felix slowly felt his heart rate return back to normal. He heard himself breathe again.

     "And I'll stay here until this storm passes," Chan said. "Are you ok now?"

     Felix managed to nod. He still was a little shaken. His face felt wet and he quickly wiped away the tears he didn't know he had shed.

     "You really scared us," Chan said. "Especially when Hyunjin and Seungmin said you didn't like to be alone. I was really worried my phone light would run out and I wouldn't be able to find you."

     As if on cue, Chan's phone lost the last of its charge and shut off. It now really was pitch black. "Uh... does your phone have charge, Felix?"

     "Oh, right!" Felix picked up the phone next to him and turned it on. "Wow, I finally meet you in real life and it's like... this." He sighed. "I'm really sorry."

     "Huh, what do you mean? There's literally no better way to meet a friend!" Chan said, laughing. "But in all seriousness, text everyone else to tell them you're ok."

     "On it." Felix quickly sent out a message. His phone didn't explode with notifications like he thought it would. "Did everyone lose power? Are they all ok?"

     "Yeah, the electricity went out everywhere and everyone is saving their phone charges," Chan said. "They're all safe at home except Minho... he's stuck under a park canopy."

     "What!?"

     Chan sighed. "I know, I'm worried too. But I'll leave that worrying to everyone else cause currently, we're stuck in a mall."

     "Do we just... wait?" Felix asked.

     "I guess so," Chan said. "But meanwhile..." Chan turned towards Felix. "Let's talk about you. You were practically having a panic attack. Why?"

     "Didn't Hyunjin and Seungmin already tell you?" Felix quickly said, trying to dodge the question.

     "Yes, but WHY?" Chan asked again. "Mate, this isn't just a 'dislike of being alone'. This is something else. And sometimes talking about it can make it better." He then paused after hearing how demanding his voice sounded. "Do you... want to talk about it? I'm a pretty good listener and I really think you should get it out in the open."

     Felix felt a lump in his throat. He hated talking about it. But something told him that if he simply switched the topic, he'd feel worse than he already was. Maybe Chan was right. He might as well rip off the bandaid.

     "I was around ten..." Felix began, already dreading the memory. "I was on a road trip with my dad and we ran out of gas in the middle of the road. It was a really complicated situation and he had no choice but to leave me waiting on the side of the road. But..." Felix choked up. He couldn't say the rest.

     Chan remained silent and then very cautiously spoke. "Can I assume... this has something to do with you saying you... don't have a dad?"

     Felix nodded, already feeling hot tears coming from his eyes. "Sorry..." He quickly wiped them away. "Anyways, I met a boy while waiting and stayed with his family after... it happened. My mom permanently transferred to Australia to take care of me until she got a transfer back here. That's my life in a nutshell."

     Felix felt the silence in the air suffocating again. This was the first time he had ever told anyone his story and he knew why. The memories now burned fresh in his mind.

     But next to him, he heard a gasp from Chan. "Felix... it's you!?"

     "Huh? What do you mean?" That was not the reaction Felix had been expecting.

     "Felix, do you remember me!? The paper airplane, the Friday nights, the park with the sky, do you remember!?"

     With a start, Felix picked up his phone and shone the light on Chan's face to get a better look. His eyes widened.

     Chan's facial features... they suddenly became familiar to Felix. Slowly but surely, Felix began to recognize the person in front of him. He couldn't believe he never realized it before.

     "Christopher?"