Passionate Exchange

Chapter Fifty-Three

We stay like that for a while, me crying against his chest and him letting me. I relax into his embrace, allowing his arms to shield me from everything bad in the world.

I forget about the guilt I feel every time I look at Penny, knowing that I'm keeping something so important from her. How could I tell her after so long? I wouldn't even be able to find the right words. Hi, Penny, I'm sorry but there's something unnamed going on between me and your brother and I kept it from you because I didn't want you to hate me. That's definitely not the way to say it.

Does Archer even want her to know? I know he said there was nothing to tell before but has his opinion on it changed? Technically we're not together and I'm not even sure he wants us to be. It's all so confusing but what isn't is how I feel about him. He makes me feel safe and happy. I've never felt this way about someone before. It's part of the reason why I haven't told her. I don't want to jeopardise this happiness. Something rings in my head but, for the moment, I try to ignore it. Selfish.

As if he senses my inner turmoil, Archer lifts me into the air, swinging me around. I throw my head back in laughter as the thoughts from only moments ago vanish. Once my feet are back on the ground, I tilt my head to meet his gaze.

His mouth lowers to mine, his eyes attaching themselves to mine. I pull my lip in between my teeth as the distance between us closes. My heart races as it continues to narrow until there's no space left. His lips move against mine almost on instinct as he kisses me. Just like the first time, it takes my breath away. I instinctively wrap my arms around his neck and tug him closer.

The snow continues to fall around us. It's the only thing proving to me that time hasn't stopped. I'm sure my hair is coated with little white flecks, but I don't care. I kiss Archer with no care in the world. I lose myself in his scent, his taste, his touch. This was all so new to me a couple of months ago but now it feels like we've been doing this for ages.

If someone told me that I'd be kissing him in London while the snow falls around us like something out of a freaking movie, I wouldn't believe them. Even now that our bodies are flush against each other and my heart is pounding against my chest from the sensation it still feels surreal. But it feels natural too.

We pull away to catch our breath. Our chests rise and fall in unison as his breath fans across my cheeks with every exhale. A pale pink stains my cheeks. If I weren't too distracted by what just happened, I'd blame it on the cold weather.

"I like kissing you." He admits as he rests his forehead on mine.

"You've told me that already."

He grips my waist and pulls me closer to him, only adding to the seriousness of his words. "And I meant it. I really like kissing you."

There's a storm brewing in his eyes as he tells me this. It almost looks like he's afraid. No, it can't be. He wouldn't be afraid of kissing me, right? Or is there more to it? Honestly, the reality of what we're doing scares me too sometimes. This can't last forever. He lives in Portland and I live in London. We'll be thousands of miles away from each other after senior year is over.

I can't help but remember what Penny told me. She mentioned someone's name, Beth. I still don't know who she is or how she could be responsible for him being the way he is. I find myself wishing that she had told me more but quickly change my mind. It's not for her to tell me. If anyone were going to tell me about her it would have to be Archer.

*

It's now the night. I'm lying on my bed with Sadie.

My dad proved to Archer and Penny that he was a good cook, no surprise there. He spent most of the day rushing around in the kitchen with a billion different pans everywhere. We hardly saw him. Once we sat down at the dinner table with plates full of all the traditional food it was worth it.