Passionate Exchange

Chapter Fifty-Eight

Melissa points out as she picks flowers for the next bouquet, "you're quieter than usual."

This is my third shift since the holidays. We didn't get much chance to talk last week, the shop was overrun with customers. They were queueing out the door at one point. It's unusual for us to have two customers here at the same time let alone a whole shop full. Melissa prepared me for it though. She said that the holidays are the second busiest time of the year, the first being Valentine's day. We were working non-stop so the only time we'd talk is when we were passing each other saying things like "there are so many customers' or 'when will this end?'

I've gotten used to seeing Archer now, well, as used to it as I can get. We never stopped and talked to each other before, but he'd always have this look in his eyes as if he wanted to. I think making eye contact with me was his way of telling me he was thinking about me. Now, we pass each other, and he doesn't even spare me a glance. When our eyes do meet, which isn't often, they are void of any emotion entirely.

Lucky for me, we haven't had to act like we're okay around anyone either. Sophie and Henry have been working a lot recently, so we haven't had to sit at the table together and suffer through eating dinner. Plus, he's been spending a lot of his time out of the house which I'm not complaining about. It means no awkward encounters when we pass each other on the stairs.

I do wish I'd get over what happened faster, so I was able to keep my promise to my dad. I can't deny it, I'm sad sometimes. When I see him at school, laughing with his friends, my heart feels like it's being ripped out of my chest. I still wish I could make him laugh like that. There's also a part of me that wishes he didn't have it so easy. I'm being put through this pain so why isn't he? I know it's wrong to think like that though.

"Sorry." I apologise sheepishly as I wrap a bunch of flowers. What she's saying is true, I have been quiet. The only words I've spoken are 'thank you' when she passes me the next handful of flowers to wrap.

"No, don't apologise. It's okay to be quiet sometimes." I give her a grateful smile; she's always been understanding. "Unless there's something wrong." She adds. My gaze shifts around the room anxiously. "Is there something wrong?"

I chew my lip and continue with the task I'm doing. If I'm going to do this, I need something to distract me. "Promise you won't tell anyone."

She laughs gently, placing her hand on her chest. "Who would I tell? The only other people I see are the customers."

Hearing this doesn't make me feel any better about speaking the words aloud. I haven't spoken about what happened to anyone. I feel like if I do it will all become real, too real.

I sigh deeply, "We sort of broke up." I avoid eye contact with her, knowing that I don't need to say his name for her to know who I'm talking about. He's been the main topic of our conversations recently only this time it's for a different reason.

I hear the flowers she had in her hands drop back into the basket, but I don't look. I continue wrapping the ones she handed me last. Don't look, don't look, don't look. If I look, I'll cry, and no one needs to see that.

"You did?" I can hear the surprise in her voice.

"Well, technically we didn't break up because we were never together. But he cut off whatever was going on." I stop trying to correct myself because I know that she knows everything about our relationship. Usually, I'd smile when he was mentioned but now all it brings me is pain.

Her arms wrap around me comfortingly. I'm tense at first but I soon allow myself to relax. She smells of flowers. I'm not sure if it's a floral perfume that she wears or if it's simply from the amount of time she spends in the shop. Not only does she smell of flowers, but she also smells of coffee too. It's warming. It reminds me of the wintertime when I would rush into the nearest coffee shop with my dad and order a hot drink to keep us warm. We'd place our hands around the cup and wait for them to heat up before we drank it.