cover you up

three•her

Another long week, I dropped out of uni.

I can't even wake up in the morning. Usually I fall asleep at 10 and wake up at again at noon. Aaron has been hounding me to get a job, he says it'll feel better to pay my own rent, although he also claims that it's good control.

Well, I smell bull.

Dan visited, he only talks to me. That was nice. We avoided the topic of Cassie which is yet another sibling trait; if you pretend like it doesn't exist, it won't. We're lying to ourselves, we know that, but at least I don't cry every day.

Dan told me he tried smoking and he coughed so hard he threw up. I laughed so hard, a real laugh this time. I kept teasing him about it and it never got old, after a few hours of taunts he would just blush. Mother only let him stay one night since he's 15 and it's a 'college town', but before he left I hugged him so fucking tight. Dan reminds all of us of her; he's so much like Cassie. I started crying and he promised me, "we'll be okay, we'll be okay." so then I cried harder because fuck, I'm leaning on my younger brother for support. I pulled his bangs back and told him "please never change." and kissed him on the forehead. He nodded and left, giving into the torturous sound of mum honking her horn fiercely. I rolled my teary eyes in response at her ridiculousness.

If I still lived with them, I would have probably killed her by now.

About an hour after Dan left, Aaron came over. No knock this time. I think we're becoming... friends? No, we couldn't be.

"Guess what?" He said in a high chirpy voice as he sat down on the couch next to me and patted my thigh.

"Did you finally realize your friend doesn't live here anymore so you can stop coming here?" I ask sarcastically, but he takes it somewhat seriously and gives me a disapproving look.

"I met a guy..." A fake gasp escapes my mouth and to broaden the 'surprise' I widen my eyes.

"Aaron that's not very Christian of you!" I joke.

"Could you shut the fuck up for like two seconds." He said it as a command rather than a question.

"Jesus- Aaron you are going hell!" He hates me by now and I smile proudly.

"Okay! I give up! I won't tell you!" He says dramatically and throws his hands up in the air. My hand flew up as well when I pulled him back down before he could leave me when he got up.

"Okay real talk. What is it?" He looks questionably at me and then gets excited again. He literally squeals. You can just tell he was Cassies friend.

"So I met... the owner of that music store in Leeds!"

"Oh cool." Well I guess that's kinda cool.

"Yeah I met him at that bonfire! He was so nice and I asked if he was hiring...?" I shrugged, actually working at a place like that would be cool. That place is practically a music maze, it's amazing.

"and..." I asked. Not getting too hopeful.

"He said yes! He said that no one really has applied for the job! The shop needs someone new, so I told him about you! He said you sounded wonderful for the job and I know you don't want a job, but you love that shop!! Plus, it's not that far away an-" I cut him off by putting my hand over his mouth.

"Thank you so much, honestly. I know I can be a bitch but you've been helping me through this all and you haven't even had time for yourself. so thank you, I'll check it out tonight, but don't think this is a regular thing mister." He was smiling so hard it was almost like he has never heard anyone say thank you. Well... he'd just never heard me say thank you.

To pay him for his kindness I treated him to sushi for lunch. Aaron is a vegan just like cassie was, so we got the sweet potato rolls and the California rolls. Then we ate until the food turned gross and we couldn't eat anymore. I got so sick of morning star, this was the best meal I've had in weeks. We actually had a good time. After our meal we took a stroll around the town.

"I know you loved cassie." I say out of nowhere. He looks down at me.

"I know and I'm sorry. I mean it should have been you all those times instead of those meaty guys who just liked her for her body. The only excuse I can think of for her is that's all she's known for. It made her comfortable in a weird way to not have to commit." I keep my eyes peeled on my feet walking on the pavement.

"I know, Elana. She was always on the edge though. That's why I was so protective over her. I guess it didn't work out in the end."

"I think she loved you too..." I said quietly.

"How you figure that?"

"Gosh, you guys were made for each other. I used to think you guys were so much like Chandler and Monica. You would always sit so close and say nice things to each other. I guess it was just simple things, but I could tell. I actually saw you that one time when she was having a panic attack and you kissed her knuckles. She relaxed right after."

I looked over to the bench and asked "Can we sit?" He nodded yes.

We sat for about 2 minutes in silence until I saw a tear fall down his cheek. I did the only thing I could think, because sometimes all it takes is a hug.

I snuggled close to his side and pulled his arm over my shoulders. I placed my hands on the other side of his waist and we just sat like that. Both healing a little more from the scar Cassie left on our hearts.