Residues

Chapter 12

Nimish and I were kissing. I was at his apartment. I had even bought a new dress for this thing. A red dress. I got 50% off from Myntra.

And Nimish was not a good kisser. I could see that he was nervous. And that he did not have much experience. I helped him out by taking the lead.

I slowly began to unbutton his shirt. Finally, after 7 years.

But Nimish caught my hand when I touched the buckle of his pants.

"What?" I asked.

"Eh... Can we do this after marriage?"

"What?" I snapped, even though he sounded so innocent.

"I know... I know... Just that God may not forgive. Ayyo Ayyappa..." He looked up.

I squinted. "You said you are okay with fun."

"We are having fun, no?" He said. "Let's kiss more... And I can... touch you down there and all... I mean, only if you want to. I don't mean that you would want to. I mean..."

"Nimish, I understood what you mean," I said.

"Okay..."

"I need to be upfront with you. I can't just marry you... I mean, we hardly know each other."

"Yet you were about to do it with me." He reminded me.

"Yeah. Yeah, I was..."

"Why won't you want to marry me? Am I not good looking enough?"

"No." I shook my head. "I... Just..."

"I earn enough to give someone a happy life."

"It's not that..." I said.

Why don't I want to marry him? As I told Rihan, I do want to get married and settle down and have kids. It will make my life less lonely. It will make my parents happy.

"I will think about it," I told Nimish. He smiled. "Now can you touch me down there..."

He smiled and nodded.

I knocked on Rihan's door. He opened. "Wine?" I held up the bottle. "Come on in..." Rihan walked in. "How was your date."

"He still wants to marry me."

"Told you to run."

"I can marry him." I sat down and opened the bottle.

"If you want to, then go ahead. If you are so sure..."

I was not so sure. I did not even like Nimish so much. He is a mama's boy and so... I may have had a cringe on my face because Rihan says "Your face says it all."

"Hm..." I sighed and sprawled myself on the sofa. Rihan poured the wine.

"Rihan..."

"Yeah?"

"Why did you never prepose to Suhani?"

His hands paused. He set the bottle down. And seemed to be thinking.

"Hm... Because... things were going fine as it was. I had planned to get married after getting a bit more secure at my job. And I thought she will always be there." He looked down.

"Maybe she will come back," I said.

He did not reply.

"Will you take her back if she comes back?" I asked. He stayed silent.

Chapter 12.5

Will I take her back?

She is mine. Even if she stampeded over my heart,

she is still 'mine'...

I guess I will always think of her as

'mine'...