51 - Epilogue Pt 1

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"Hi, sweetheart."

The first thing Y/N noticed when she climbed into Jay's car was the overwhelming floral scent that washed over her as soon as she opened the door.

"Hey," she said with a soft smile, leaning in for a kiss.

When she pulled back, Jay studied her carefully. "How are you?" He asked, one hand coming up to brush a strand of hair from her face.

Y/N tried to muster a brave smile but failed. And it's all the answer he needed.

With a pained noise, he reached for your hand, gently squeezing it. "I'm... I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Y/N said quietly, sitting back in her seat, grateful for the way Jay's hand was wrapped around hers. "Thank you for coming with me today."

"I wouldn't have missed it," he said earnestly. "Are you... ready to go?"

She nodded silently and he turned his attention to the car, easing it into reverse and glancing over his shoulder.

Y/N followed his gaze and discovered the source of the frankly violent flower smell; the backseat of his car was filled with bouquets.

She stared in consternation at the veritable flower shop in the back of her husband's car, trying to count the bunches.

"Jay..." She said after a moment.

Glancing over at her, his gaze darted to the rearview mirror and the garden in the backseat. "Oh..." He said shyly. "I... I wasn't sure which bouquet would be the best, so I... I bought a few of them."

"A few?" Y/N laughed. "I count nine!"

He furrowed his eyebrows a little as he said, "Only nine?"

"Only?"

Some of his embarrassment was fading at the genuine light this had brought to your face. "There should be thirteen..."

This brought a genuine cackle from the depths of Y/N's soul, but she squeezed his hand to make sure he knew she meant no malice.

"Thirteen bouquets?"

Jay shrugged, one side of his mouth turning up in a tentative smile. "Yes."

Eyes darting to her face again, he shrugged once more and said, "At first I was just going to get five- you know, one for you, one for me, one for Hana, and two for... for your parents. But then I couldn't decide which one would be best, so I- I got a few options, and then... then those didn't seem quite right, so-"

"So you just kept buying more," Y/N finished for him, twisting back in her seat to study his face fondly.

"Areum was very helpful-"

"I'm sure she was!" She laughed.

"And I just... I hoped that somewhere in these would be the perfect ones, you know?" Coming to a red light, he turned to face her. "Is it okay?"

In answer, Y/N reached over and kissed him, smiling as she felt his grip tighten on her hand. "It's more than okay, Jay," she said when she pulled back. "It's perfect. Thank you."

He smiled, content, and turned back just in time for the green light.

When they reached the cemetery, Jay climbed out of the car first and stood in sudden trepidation, staring at the back seat. "I might not have thought this through..."

Grinning, Y/N moved around to his side of the car, slipping her hand into his and resting her head on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Y/N hid her grin by turning her head to kiss his shoulder and offered a suggestion, "Let's pick five of our favorites to leave here today. We can take the rest home. They'll be nice."

It took them ten whole minutes to decide which flowers should be left at the graves and which should take the car ride back home with them.

He was so deliberate and serious in his decision-making, Y/N's only concern was that it might take longer, but she couldn't really find it in her to be upset at the delay.

She wasn't looking forward to entering the cemetery.

Laden down with flowers, the two of them silently approached her parents' graves. Jay carefully helped her arrange each bouquet, then stepped back to observe the work.

"They look beautiful." She said and smiled weakly.

Jay glanced over at Y/N gratefully, his relief eclipsing his grief for just a moment before it returns. Touching the headstones respectfully, he started to get to his feet.

"I can't believe it's been six years already..." Y/N whispered, mostly to herself, and at that, something inside her broke.

Inhaling roughly, she was overcome by a sudden tidal wave of tears, and she felt her knees go weak. Before she could fall too far, though, he's somehow at her side.

He caught her, holding her upright with a steady grip. "Easy, darling," he said, pulling her close against him as the sobs wracked her body.

Murmuring her name a few times, Jay kissed the top of her head. "I'm so sorry."

"I miss them," Y/N gasped through her tears. "They've been gone for six years, Jay. Six years." She tried to stand, but her knees still buckled under her.

He readjusts his grip, holding her more securely. "I know. I'm... I'm sorry."

Taking a deep breath, he softly stroked her hair and looked at the graves. "I promise that I will take care of Y/N and Hana for the rest of my life. They'll be safe by my side and I would never leave them. Ever."

He paused a moment and stared at Y/N who was looking at him before he looked back at her parents' graves. "I know you're gone but... I'm sure that you're looking after us from above. So don't worry, Y/N and our daughter will be safe in my arms."

Unable to look at the headstones any longer, Y/N turned in towards him, hiding her face in his chest and letting all the pieces of her broken heart fall out of place again.

He didn't say much, words didn't always come easily to him, but he held her tight, kissing the top of her head and stroking her hair until she couldn't cry anymore, until she's all cried out, exhausted.

When Y/N managed to stand on her own again, he gently and carefully helped her wipe the remaining tears from her face, purposefully making an overly dramatic fuss until a smile broke through on her face.

Satisfied, he kissed the tip of her nose and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Are you glad we came?"

"Yes," She said firmly, hugging him tightly. "I really needed to come here. But I couldn't have done it alone, so thank you. And," she added, nodding at the headstones which were now crowded by flowers,

"I love the flowers. They look perfect. Mom and dad would be happy."

He smiled. "I love you."

"Love you more," Y/N challenged.

He rolled his eyes but still couldn't resist saying, "Love you the most."

Y/N laughed and pulled away, slipping her hand into his again and tugging him gently back towards the parking lot.

She climbed back into the passenger seat, feeling much lighter after her cathartic breakdown, and inhaled the flowery air happily.

Jay started the car and glanced over at her, his perfect smile crossing his face at how happy she seemed.

"What?"

Y/N leaned over to plant a kiss on his cheek. "Nothing. I'm just really excited to have all those beautiful flowers in our house."

He sighed, but took her teasing welI, stretching his arm out to rest on her knee.

"Well," he said as he smiled, pulling out of the parking space, "I'm glad you like them."

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