Mrs. Avery

Chapter 5

Aggie woke up to a pitch-dark room. She lay there letting herself remember the previous day. She spread her hand over the cold fabric in search of her phone. When she found it and squeezed the button on the side, she blinded herself and immediately turned the phone downward.

"Geez." She mumbled as she rubbed her eyes. She sat up and did her best to squint at the screen. There were 8 missed calls and 3 voicemails.

"Fuck." She said quietly as she took note of the time, it was 3:26 in the morning. She got up and meandered towards the light switch.

When her eyes felt better adjusted she assessed her phone. She had a voicemail from a phone number that matched the Nile area code, but she was immediately drawn into the voicemail from Larry, worried she had missed something important and left him in the midst of a problem. She immediately pressed play.

"Miss Aggie, I haven't heard from you. And I wanted to make sure that you landed okay. I know this whole thing is probably really tough and I want you to know that I can be there with you." He had a long awkward pause. "I know... I'm probably not the most desirable company in a moment like this," another long Larry-pause. "but I don't want you to be alone either." A shorter Larry type pause, "If I don't hear back from you, I plan to check in on you Friday morning. I've already talked to Mitchell. I didn't know how busy you would be when you got back so I emailed him when you left for the airport so if you forgot to call him. It's okay." He paused once again. "I'll see you Friday, I'll have breakfast for us. And Miss Aggie, just take it easy, okay?" and she heard the click as he hung up.

"He has no idea how desirable of company he is." She said as she made her way downstairs. When her eyes felt less assaulted by the light she texted him. A phone call at this hour seemed cruel.

Larry, I would love your company. Thank you for checking up on me.

For no other reason than habit, she began to make herself coffee. Momma kept the kitchen organized in almost the exact same way. She then listened to the voicemail from her boss.

"Aggie, don't be ridiculous." He said softly. "Take as much time as you need. I don't want to see you at the office on Monday. I want you to take some time, Larry told me what is actually going on and if you need anything from me besides time off, then just ask, alright?" He paused, being slightly awkward, very much unlike him. He cleared his throat. "I've asked Larry to stop at your apartment and grab you some clothing: a black dress and odds and ends. From the sounds of your voicemail, it seems like you went straight to Nile and I don't think you should have to be worrying about these things. I hope I'm not overstepping, but I know how wrapped up in this job you are and I know how much that has given me back to my family. Believe me, when I say that no portion of that is overlooked or under appreciated. My wife is sending a bunch of dinners with Larry so that you won't have anything to worry about." Aggie could hear his wife in the background. "Tell her, I'm so sorry and that we love her." Her whispering tones made Aggie's heart feel warm for a moment. She imagined her over Mitchell's shoulder. "We are so sorry, Aggie. Please let us know, if you need anything. And I mean anything." He said. The line clicked with his wife starting up about something. Aggie smiled. She loved them too and then for whatever reason the smile on her face quickly dipped into a frown. She began to sob into her hands over the counter as the coffee started to brew.

She drank cup of coffee after cup of coffee. She continued to drink it even after her heart felt like it was in full protest. It felt like something to do, something she could do and not think about.

When it finally reached an appropriate hour she ran errands. She ran to the hospital, the post office, and reached out on every account that Momma had. She shut everything down while remaining as empty as possible, but when she finally hung up the phone that night on the last call she had to make, she pulled a large bottle of whiskey out. She had a made a pit stop on her way home and by the end of the day she was grateful she had humored herself on this one.

She poured a heavy handed cup and sat down at the table. She took a large swig and breathed through her teeth to cope with it. Then she pulled the cup down from her mouth and looked around the house. The living room was poorly lit from the kitchen light and she knew the upstairs was getting just as dark. The night was setting in. She would need to get through this... all over again.

She took another large swig and put the cup down. Then she surveyed her surroundings again only to come to the same conclusion. Then she went to reach for her phone. Only to realize that before her hand even touched it that she didn't have anyone to call. She had promised Evan that their relationship wouldn't interfere with work. And outside of him, there wasn't anyone she wanted, not really. She brought her hands back to her face and covered her mouth.

"Momma, I don't know how to be alone like this." She whispered and put her head down as she ran her hands back through her hair. She wasn't just alone in that she was the only one physically present; she was alone in a way that her heart wasn't connected to anyone so freely anymore. There were limitations on every other connection. It was another kind of alone and she hated it. She felt herself break, like an actual snap inside, but it didn't make a noise. It made her body curl in on itself like maybe that would push the pieces back together, but it didn't so she just cried.

And then she just felt the worst urge to be distant from it. And she took 2 more large gulps from her glass. She followed it with a third, leaned back in her chair, and just waited as she dried her face.

Within the hour she had achieved emptiness and distance with a foggy brain. Her state of mind was only interrupted by knocking on the door.